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Band 5

Some people say that shops should sell the food products of local markets whenever possible, rather than importing from abroad. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #shops #food #products #markets
In recent centuries, the advances in transportation made
possible
Correct pronoun usage
it possible
show examples
 to market abroad
products
 in local markets. While
this
 situation has some advantages, it includes many drawbacks for national development. İn
this
 essay, I will
Correct your spelling
discuss
show examples
discus
Correct your spelling
discuss
show examples
possible
Correct article usage
the possible
show examples
 consequences of increasing abroad marketing. There are several advantages of reaching abroad imported
products
.
Firstly
, it provides variable
products
 you can choose which is not produced in your own country.
For instance
Add a comma
,
show examples
tropical fruits could not be produced in northern countries and they are dependent
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 abroad importation for
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
products
.
On the other hand
, free marketing is essential for some countries where farming opportunities are limited.
Besides
, there are some disadvantages of abroad importing of
food
products
.
To begin
 with, selling
local
Replace the word
locally
show examples
 produced
food
products
 of local markets decreases the dependency
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other countries and saves own resources.
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
 local trading supports local farmers and microeconomy.
In addition
 marketing of local
food
products
 does not be affected
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 political and economical changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 other states.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 currency changes at the origin of the
food
 product generally
determines
Change the verb form
determine
show examples
 the cost of the
products
.
This
 condition consequences price destabilization. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 selling
food
products
 of local markets has several advantages while it has some disadvantages. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 local marketing provides
long standing
Add a hyphen
long-standing
show examples
 economical improvement.
Instead
 of free marketing,
selling
Correct article usage
the selling
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
local
food
products
 may lead
wealth
Change preposition
to wealth
show examples
 for citizenship.
Submitted by ahm0067 on

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Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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