Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is inportant to rest the mind during leisure time

Many people believe that it is
sign
Correct article usage
a sign
show examples
to use spare data for things that enhance peoples' minds. Others think that it is vital to relax the mind during the free period.
However
, I support the idea that the human race should use leisure minutes for
activities
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
improve their brains. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I shall discuss both sides and suggest with mu opinion. On the one hand, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
individuals
Add an article
the individuals
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have exhausting work. Due to
this
reason, they relax when they are free and do not want to do anything. People claim that they need
for
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apply
show examples
plenty of moments because they are not able to do all tasks and spare
this
amount of hours for relaxing and developing their minds.
Moreover
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days a greater number of
Add an article
the nation
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nation
Fix the agreement mistake
nations
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became lazy. Thereby, they do not
pursuie
Correct your spelling
pursue
pursuit
to improve their mental intelligence.
For example
, almost 15% of adults from 18 to 25 years, used to watch movies, eat food or lay on the sofa while relaxing. They find
this
as the best method of relaxation and stressing out after the hard
Correct your spelling
working day
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working-day
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working day
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.
On the other hand
, leisure
activities
Change the noun form
activity
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is
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are
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a great opportunity to improve their mental aptitude by reading and doing word puzzles.
This
can be useful to relieve individuals' stress and tension,
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
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their other skills and make their brains work at the same time.
For instance
, doing regular
activities
such
as reading books, magazines, or playing interactive games raises the level of IQ and reduces the chance of having short term memory in parallel. In conclusion,
although
some people need to have a total rest during a time when they are not working, I believe, that spending
this
time doing developing
activities
have a more beneficial impact on humanities' mentality, as it has positive results on peoples' mental condition.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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