These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
tend to live in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
place
Use synonyms
where it is not their hometown. Many
people
Use synonyms
migrate to new places, like
city
Use synonyms
even
another country
Fix the agreement mistake
other countries
show examples
, and leave the
place
Use synonyms
where they come from. It may
as a result
Linking Words
of financial and occupation demand or even they just want to live in new
circumtance
Correct your spelling
circumstances
circumstance
. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
type of development can bring negative and positive
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
society.
However
Linking Words
, for me, it will more advantages than disadvantages.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
I will describe my opinion from both
perspective
Change to a plural noun
perspectives
show examples
, especially the weaknesses of
this
Linking Words
development.
To begin
Linking Words
with, the benefit of migration is
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
in financial support and better carrier, as the value in our society the better job and the more money we have, the more wealth we are.
People
Use synonyms
often
move
Use synonyms
to
Use synonyms
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
to get
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
and gain more money. It is not only distance movement but
also
Linking Words
social
Add an article
a social
show examples
movement. Through
Use synonyms
move
Add an article
the move
show examples
to
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
place
Use synonyms
, they can
also
Linking Words
change their life fortune.
For instance
Linking Words
, my parents are
migrant
Fix the agreement mistake
migrants
show examples
. They
move
Use synonyms
from one village to the capital
city
Use synonyms
of the province where I am living now. At the
first
Linking Words
, they went to
Use synonyms
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
for getting
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
education. Yet,
finnaly
Correct your spelling
finally
, they got better carrier in the
city
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, they decided to
move
Use synonyms
away from their hometown.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
disadvantages
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
types of job in their origin
place
Use synonyms
will disappear.
For example
Linking Words
, as I mentioned before about my parents, the fact that a lot of my
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
from the same
vilage
Correct your spelling
village
also
Linking Words
moved from that village.
As a result
Linking Words
, the village looks so
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
, and there is only a
handfull
Correct your spelling
handful
of
people
Use synonyms
are living there. Yet, the most tragic is that most of the fertile soil there
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is not
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
again owing to the fact that lack of
farmer
Fix the agreement mistake
farmers
show examples
there. To conclude,
moved
Change the form of the verb
moving
show examples
to other places and leave the origin
place
Use synonyms
, can be
Correct article usage
an advantage
show examples
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
and
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
. Yet, from my perspective,
this
Linking Words
development will be more destructive than constructive if there is no
desicive
Correct your spelling
decisive
regulation to control the movement of
people
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • metropolitan
  • migration
  • globalization
  • socio-economic factors
  • traditional norms
  • cosmopolitan environment
  • brain drain
  • assimilation
  • gentrification
  • alienation
  • multiculturalism
  • infrastructure strain
What to do next:
Look at other essays: