Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#adults #time #computer #games #development

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In the modern world, more and more individuals enjoy playing

games

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on computers rather than taking part in outdoor activities. The reasons for

this

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vary and I would argue that

this

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can have an adverse impact on the people. There are a host of reasons behind

this

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phenomenon. One of them is the fact that computer

games

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are well-known to be cheaper and simpler than any other kind of recreation.

This

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can

also

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be an effective way to entertain those who do not have much free

time

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. To illustrate,

instead

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of going outside to play tennis, a sport that requires lots of money and

time

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to master, one can buy themselves a computer to play

games

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during their spare

time

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As a result

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this

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can save both

time

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and money since

video

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games

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require no skills or practice in order to have the best experience. Despite being an uncomplicated and effective way of refreshment, I still believe

this

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is a negative movement.

Video

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games

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can be very addictive,

thus

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it can be very

time

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-consuming if the players can not manage

Use synonyms

time

Correct pronoun usage

their time

show examples

properly.

Additionally

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video

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games

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can be the cause of some popular mental issues.

For instance

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, scientists have already proven that violent

video

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games

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make people become less sympathetic.

This

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due to

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the frequent contact with brutal scenes in those

games

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that people gradually get used to. In conclusion, playing computer

games

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is an undeniably efficient method of entertainment.

However

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this

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development may be unfavourable as it can take up

time

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and cause some mental illnesses if not handled well enough.

Submitted by jakedth162 on Sat Mar 05 2022

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task response

Address all parts of the task more thoroughly to ensure a complete response.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure clearer development and organization of ideas to improve coherence and cohesion.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people prefer to live in rented homes rather than purchasing their own homes

The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweigh is increasing. What are the reasons for the growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are tought to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adult. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People are having more and more sugar drinks. What are the reasons? What are the solutions to make people drink less?