Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

#people #information #research #business #world

There are

believes

Replace the word

beliefs

show examples

that some

data

should be shared as much as possible in

scientidic

Correct your spelling

scientific

research, academic and business world.

However

, some of them think that some

data

is quite vital and valuable to be

acceced

Correct your spelling

accessed

for everyone. In my opinion, I agree with both views and in

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will try to explain my point of view. From my point of view, it is crucial to provide as much

information

as possible

Change preposition

show examples

different scientific

researches

Fix the agreement mistake

research

show examples

, educational and business topics. It gives

Remove the article

apply

show examples

plenty of opportunities to advance your knowledge, which

as a result

may increase your

awarness

Correct your spelling

awareness

of a

particelar

Correct your spelling

particular

field.

Furthermore

, the more

emperical

Correct your spelling

empirical

and valuable

information

accessibale

Correct your spelling

accessible

, the more it will help to

develope scinece

Correct your spelling

develop science

and

academic

Correct article usage

the academic

show examples

world

further

For instance

, many students use

imporatant

Correct your spelling

important

data

for their academic and scientific

researches

Fix the agreement mistake

research

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

them to study complex tasks.

On the other hand

, some people think that free access to valuable and important

information

is not a good idea. Probably, the reason is that written articles or reports are

time consuming

Add a hyphen

time-consuming

show examples

and demand quite a lot of

efforts

Fix the agreement mistake

effort

show examples

. In

this

regard, I think it is better to give a right to an author to decide whether the

data

should be accessible, paid or not accessible at all.

For example

, when I was writing my

bachelor

Change noun form

bachelor's

show examples

diploma, I used to buy paid articles in order to be sure that the

information

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

accurate and

emprecal

Correct your spelling

empirical

. In conclusion, I support both views equally, since I think, that

data

should be free in a bid to make studies and raise your

awarnes

Correct your spelling

awareness

about

scintefic

Correct your spelling

scientific

, business and academic

awarness

Correct your spelling

awareness

However

, if the author

disagree

Change the verb form

disagrees

show examples

to share

Change preposition

with sharing

show examples

researches

Fix the agreement mistake

research

show examples

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

freely, it could be paid or not shared at all.

Submitted by burtebaeva02 on Wed Feb 21 2024

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coherence cohesion

To enhance your essay's logical structure, focus on ensuring a seamless flow of ideas. Begin with a clear thesis statement in your introduction, followed by body paragraphs that each present a distinct point supporting your stance. Use transitional phrases to guide the reader smoothly from one point to the next.

coherence cohesion

Make sure your introduction and conclusion are well-defined. The introduction should outline what the essay will cover, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your arguments, reinforcing your position. This clarity will strengthen the overall impact of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Support your main points with more specific examples and evidence. While you provide some examples, enhancing them with detailed evidence or citing more concrete instances can greatly improve your argument's persuasiveness and show a deeper understanding of the topic.

task achievement

Ensure your essay fully responds to all aspects of the prompt by offering a balanced discussion. While you've addressed both sides of the argument, further elaboration on each viewpoint with more depth and complexity can increase your task achievement score.

task achievement

Your essay would benefit from clear and comprehensive ideas articulated in each paragraph. Try to develop your points thoroughly, ensuring that each paragraph makes a significant contribution to your overall argument. This means going beyond stating your opinion to explaining the rationale behind it in a way that is understandable and persuasive.

task achievement

Incorporate relevant and specific examples to solidify your arguments. When mentioning examples, ensure they are directly related to your main points and are detailed enough to illustrate your argument clearly. More precise and relevant examples can strengthen your essay by demonstrating a direct connection to the topic and showing your understanding of the subject matter.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

information sharing
scientific research
business
academic world
advancement of knowledge
progress
collaboration
cross-disciplinary research
open access
democratization of information
transparency
credibility
intellectual property
security concerns
commercial interests

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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific world, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Employers should give their staff at least a 4-week holiday a year to help employees perform better in their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the government should spend more money in putting in more works of art like painting and statutes in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

task 2: Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcycles are banned from the city center. People are encouraged to use public transportation such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free days. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?