IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

#spite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
In today's world, agriculture has developed gradually due to recent technological innovations. Despite
this
 fact, numerous people are suffered from famine throughout the world. The aim of
this
 essay is to examine the issues which have resulted in hunger and
also
 recommend various means to tackle the situation. There are plenty of reasons why parts of societies are in hunger.
First
 and foremost, foods and beverages are consumed redundantly.
Therefore
, unnecessary amounts of feed are produced for the consumers.
For instance
, in restaurants or cafes, customers always want to eat fresh and newly-made meals.
As a result
 of
this
, every product is bought daily to meet
this
 need.
Furthermore
, if the products remain at the end of the day, they will be rubbish even if they have newly bought.
Secondly
, sharing with other individuals is not common in most societies.
For example
,
instead
 of sharing a redundant meal, the populations usually throw away the meat.
Additionally
, farmers do not want to harvest their crops. Since it is more demanding compared to the money they earn from harvesting in some countries.
Therefore
, most cultivated areas are not used for agricultural purposes. To solve these problems, sharing our foods and eating sufficiently should be learned in schools.
Thus
, communities can learn not to waste their meal and help the public who suffer from famine.
Also
, facilities that gather the leftover foodstuff for them can be established.
Hence
, the facilities might avoid famine in their countries. For the farmers' problem, the governments might take an action to solve it. They can introduce a new rule to regulate their earnings. Because of the fact that all the money from food sector generally goes to the transport services.
Therefore
 the government can organise the transportation systems. To conclude, people still suffer from hunger despite the development in agriculture. Greediness, farmers and not knowing sharing may be the reasons for
this
 issue. Proper education and rules put by governments might solve these problems.
Submitted by moralpanic on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
What to do next:
Look at other essays: