Some people believe that celebrating personal events is a waste of money. Others feel that these celebrations play an important role in the lives of individuals and in society as a whole. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Many people think that personal
celebrations
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are wasteful. While others and I disagree with the idea and believe that these
events
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play a crucial role in our lives and in the community as a whole. In the following paragraph, both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached. On the one hand, the major reason that folk say that celebrating personal
events
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is a waste of
money
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is that they think that it is better to reserve their
money
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for unexpected circumstances. In simple terms, some
individuals
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are scared of any unfavourable situations
such
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as car accidents because If they experience these situations, they will not able to work and do not have
money
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for spending.
Moreover
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, they have to keep their
money
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for spending on their retired lives. To illustrate, these days, many
individuals
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do not have offspring.
As a result
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, they need to reserve
money
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for taking care of themselves when they reach old age.
On the other hand
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, one of the obvious reasons that
individuals
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think that these
celebrations
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play a vital role in the lives of
individuals
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and in society is that these
events
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can fulfil people with happiness. in simple terms, when parents hold a birthday party for their children, their children will realise that they are beloved by their father, mother, and those who take part in a party. As a consequence, they will have self-esteem. On top of that, these
celebrations
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bring
individuals
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together.
That is
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to say, in Thailand, whenever there is a wedding ceremony of their friends or their relatives, people will gather in these
events
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. To summarize,
although
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there are tremendous reasons why folk say that holding personal
celebrations
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is a
money
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wastage, I personally agree that these
events
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are significant for human life and society.
Submitted by yanaphon.t on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • lavish parties
  • essential expenditures
  • financial stress
  • lasting memories
  • social bonds
  • emotional support
  • familial and social ties
  • mental health
  • community cohesion
  • cultural heritage
  • sense of identity
  • traditional practices
  • sense of belonging
  • continuity
  • unique cultural aspects
  • personal well-being
  • routine
  • life satisfaction
  • reasonable budget
  • cost-effective
  • potluck parties
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