Some people believe that celebrating personal events is a waste of money. Others feel that these celebrations play an important role in the lives of individuals and in society as a whole. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people think that personal
celebrations
are wasteful. While others and I disagree with the idea and believe that these
events
play a crucial role in our lives and in the community as a whole. In the following paragraph, both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached. On the one hand, the major reason that folk say that celebrating personal
events
is a waste of
money
is that they think that it is better to reserve their
money
for unexpected circumstances. In simple terms, some
individuals
are scared of any unfavourable situations
such
as car accidents because If they experience these situations, they will not able to work and do not have
money
for spending.
Moreover
, they have to keep their
money
for spending on their retired lives. To illustrate, these days, many
individuals
do not have offspring.
As a result
, they need to reserve
money
for taking care of themselves when they reach old age.
On the other hand
, one of the obvious reasons that
individuals
think that these
celebrations
play a vital role in the lives of
individuals
and in society is that these
events
can fulfil people with happiness. in simple terms, when parents hold a birthday party for their children, their children will realise that they are beloved by their father, mother, and those who take part in a party. As a consequence, they will have self-esteem. On top of that, these
celebrations
bring
individuals
together.
That is
to say, in Thailand, whenever there is a wedding ceremony of their friends or their relatives, people will gather in these
events
. To summarize,
although
there are tremendous reasons why folk say that holding personal
celebrations
is a
money
wastage, I personally agree that these
events
are significant for human life and society.
Submitted by yanaphon.t on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • lavish parties
  • essential expenditures
  • financial stress
  • lasting memories
  • social bonds
  • emotional support
  • familial and social ties
  • mental health
  • community cohesion
  • cultural heritage
  • sense of identity
  • traditional practices
  • sense of belonging
  • continuity
  • unique cultural aspects
  • personal well-being
  • routine
  • life satisfaction
  • reasonable budget
  • cost-effective
  • potluck parties
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