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Writing Samples
Band 5

These days less number of people prefer to walk. What are the causes and solutions of the situation?

Lately, most
people
Use synonyms
 these days prefer to drive rather than walk even for short distances. The advent and
access
Use synonyms
 of motor
transport
Use synonyms
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 caused
behavioral
Change the spelling
behavioural
show examples
 changes within the population,
people
Use synonyms
 choose to avoid physical activity mainly walking for travel. There are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 reasons for
this
Linking Words
 type of
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
, and steps can be taken to encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to walk. There are several causes for
this
Linking Words
 situation.
First
Linking Words
, increase in
access
Use synonyms
 to motor
transport
Use synonyms
. Transportation has become cheap and accessible for most
people
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 causes
people
Use synonyms
 to drive rather than walk.
Second
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 have been increasingly adopting
in-active
Correct article usage
an in-active
show examples
 lifestyle.
This
Linking Words
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 coupled with easier
access
Use synonyms
 to
transport
Use synonyms
 has led to
people
Use synonyms
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoiding
show examples
 walking. Various courses of action can be taken in
this
Linking Words
 situation to inculcate the preference to walk amongst
people
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
, There should be
Correct article usage
a champaign
show examples
champaign
Correct your spelling
campaign
show examples
 to encourage and educate the benefits of
active
Add an article
an active
show examples
 lifestyle.
People
Use synonyms
 should be educated about the health consequences of
sedentary
Correct article usage
a sedentary
show examples
 lifestyle especially not walking and be encouraged to develop a habit of walking
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 at least for short distances.
Second
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 should be informed about the environmental consequences around the
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
 related to not walking like taking motor
transport
Use synonyms
. While these are some measures that can be put into place to make
people
Use synonyms
 adopt walking, it is only a start.
Conclusion
Change preposition
In conclusion
show examples
, various factors have led to the issue of
people
Use synonyms
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 wanting to take a walk.
This
Linking Words
 is mostly due to the increase in ease of
access
Use synonyms
 to private and public transportation along with
people
Use synonyms
 becoming increasingly lazy leading to
avoid
Wrong verb form
avoiding
show examples
 any physical activity like
walk
Wrong verb form
walking
show examples
. Few steps can be taken to arrest
this
Linking Words
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
, education on the health benefits
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 walking and information champaign on environmental factors relating to the subsequent choices made from non-walking. At
last
Linking Words
, walking and its health benefits
trumps
Change the verb form
trump
show examples
 all the negative effects of choosing
otherwise
Linking Words
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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