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Band 4

some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets. There is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed be seen in a cinema. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #films #phones #tablets #cinema
In
this
 modern scenario,there have been immense advances in technology in most aspects of
people
's lives,
therefore
 a proportion of society think that we can watch
movies
 on the internet using electronic gadgets
such
 as mobiles and laptops,so there is no need
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 theatres for
individuals
.
In contrast
,others argue that watching a picture in
auditorium
Correct article usage
an auditorium
show examples
 gives full entertainment and experience.According to me,the former statement is the best.
This
 essay will discuss both trends. To embark on,nowadays,many
individuals
 tend to watch pictures on the OTT platforms
such
 as Hotstar,Aha and Netflix these have become common among youngsters,
thus
 these apps make them feel comfortable
instead
 of going to cinema halls.
For instance
,according to the survey,these
website
Change the determiner
websites
show examples
 are earning more money compared to the theatres.
Moreover
,there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 no restrictions in terms of managing
time
 which attracts
people
 to watch
movies
 on the websites rather than auditoriums where
individuals
 should have to go on
time
.
For example
,in film rooms,shifts like morning,afternoon and evening,so multitudes have to watch a
movie
 in that particular
time
 only which feel them more uncomfortable.
Furthermore
,the price factor is
also
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 considerable thing for
people
,
therefore
this
 is
also
 one of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
 why the masses do not prefer to go to halls as the cost of
ticket
Fix the agreement mistake
tickets
show examples
 which is imperative to enter is more in the film hall. On another hand,
Although
 many multitudes prefer to see
movies
 through their mobiles,
people
 can get enjoyment when they watch a
movie
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the theatre.
This
 is because
high
Change preposition
of high
show examples
 volume and a big screen,
thus
individuals
 can see a picture with full HD.
In addition
,not only
it
Add a missing verb
does it
show examples
gives
Wrong verb form
give
show examples
 entertainment but
also
 ensures
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of food items.To elucidate,the length of the
movie
 is approximately two hours,multitudes can get a break in the middle of a
movie
,so at that
time
, they can purchase snacks that they need. To conclude,in spite
theatres
Change preposition
of theatres
show examples
facilitate
Wrong verb form
facilitating
show examples
 many opportunities in terms of providing eatable things as well as entertainment,watching
movies
 on the internet ensures save money,comfort regarding no need to wait for that particular slot
time
.
Submitted by anushachenna15 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Convenience
  • Mobile Viewing
  • Cost-efficient
  • Time-efficient
  • Personalized experience
  • Immersive
  • Cinematic experience
  • Surround sound
  • Collective experience
  • Technical superiority
  • Sensory experience
  • Social hubs
  • Cultural events
  • Distractions
  • Preservation
  • Filmmaking art
  • Cinematographic nuances
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