IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy, with everythin organised and in the correct place. What is your opinion about it?

#people #home #workplace #everythin #place
Nowadays, it is true that the majority of students believe focusing on textbooks and
classroom
Correct article usage
the classroom
show examples
 is hard.
This
 essay will address some core reasons behind
this
 view and propose two solid solutions that should be taken by the school to tackle
this
 matter. In terms of the causes, the most important reason for
this
 opinion is that a vast range of educational methods and books is completely traditional and boring. To be more precise, not only can not they draw pupils' attention but
also
 are not informative in a true way. Another reason
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
show examples
 be considered is that pupils do not know about the benefits of
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
,
in other words
, they extremely lack the prospect for learning.
For example
, based on
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
research
has
Correct pronoun usage
that has
show examples
 been done in Iran, the majority of students claim that
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
 is a waste of time. Regarding the suitable solutions, the best measurement
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 be taken by the school is
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 arrangement of the modern
curriculumn
Correct your spelling
curriculum
 which is including various activities, ranging from taking advantage of applications to planning for distinct expeditions. Another
interensting
Correct your spelling
interesting
 step
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
show examples
 be taken by comprehensive system is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 considering various training courses in order to teach learners about the prospects for education, in consequence, they are likely to encourage to focus on the school more and more.
For instance
, information associated with different jobs
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
need to fulfil literacy in the university. In conclusion,
this
 is a fact that pupils do not concentrate on their homework. It is obvious that some causes,
such
 as being boring
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and not having adequate information about the future, are counted as contributing factors to
this
 issue.
On the other hand
, effective steps should be adopted by educational
sestems
Correct your spelling
systems
,
for
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
show examples
 creativity in learning approaches and management of social lives in the future.
Submitted by elnazkarimi1386 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: