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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that government should not give international aid since they have disadvantaged people like unemployed and homeless in their own Country. To what extent do You agree or disagree?

Internation
aid
Use synonyms
 Plays an indispensable role to make
friendship
Replace the word
friends
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 amongst the
Countries
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. It is believed by some people that the government should help
to
Change preposition
apply
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those who are really in need in their
Country
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 there are arguments on both sides, due to my own beliefs I disagree
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that the authority Should only financial help
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
needy people
instead
Linking Words
 of investing money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
international
aid
Use synonyms
. Even these beliefs will be discussed in support of my personal stance in the following paragraphs. To embark on, there is no doubt for some people who give preference to overseas
aid
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, they believe that Providing help to other
countries
Use synonyms
 will open a door for many opportunities.
for example
Linking Words
, when the richest
Country
Use synonyms
 Provides health and education facilities to the Poor
Country
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 will enable
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them to recruit more staff.
Moreover
Linking Words
, It would help
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
country
Use synonyms
 in the difficult time period.
For instance
Linking Words
, nowaday the Covid virus spread
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
worldwide and situation becomes critical
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
this
Linking Words
 time medicine Preparation were sent from
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 to India, China and many
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
other
countries
Use synonyms
.
Instead
Linking Words
 of encouraging other
countries
Use synonyms
 with the material
aid
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, the government should allocate
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 own budget
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Society in order to create community life efficiency.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, they should keep in mind that if they build new modern work buildings , hospitals and schools, it would help to an improve ideal economic of their state and as well as will have a lot of technical Opportunities to increase the education and employment opportunities. To
further
Linking Words
 Corroborate the above view recently India has started to provide free education, and,
as a result
Linking Words
,
literacy
Add an article
the literacy
show examples
 rate is increasing at an alarming as compared to the
last
Linking Words
 couple of decades.
Thus
Linking Words
, more attention on their
citizines
Correct your spelling
citizens
 , more developed
country
Use synonyms
 would be. In conclusion ,
although
Linking Words
 there are Various 1 benefits to providing attention
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 international
aid
Use synonyms
 , I would say that Primarily the government should focus
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Society rather than to the other
countries
Use synonyms
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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