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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#governments #progress #people #country
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Many governments have a belief that economic progress is their priority.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 believe that other types of progress are as important as economic
growth
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. I personally stand in the argument that developing in other things
such
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 as strengthening the military reinforcement should be treated equally important with the
growth
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 in the economy.
Firstly
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,
growth
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 in the economy does not mean that the
people
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 are happy. South Korea use to be a developing
country
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 after the Korean
war
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 it use to be one of the poorest countries in the world, but now became a developed
country
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 and some
people
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 believe that as the economy got stable it became more competitive to go to a good university and getting a job. As
people
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's standard of living increases parents start to use a lot of money for their children's education and it became more competitive and brought side effects
such
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 as an increase in suicide from stressful school work.
Secondly
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,
war
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 can happen to every
country
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. If a
country
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 loses a
war
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, economic
growth
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 will be useless. The
war
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 between Ukraine and Russia has raised awareness. It shows why the
country
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 should be strong to protect the
people
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. In conclusion, I grew up in a
country
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that is
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 still at
war
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 with North Korea. I believe that developing in the military should be an equal priority with economic
growth
Use synonyms
Submitted by joo10000760 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
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