Some people think that the Olympics is no longer important in the 21st century. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that
Olympics
have been losing their importance Correct article usage
the Olympics
along
the centuries, until becoming irrelevant nowadays. In my opinion, I disagree that Change preposition
over
Olympic
Correct article usage
the Olympic
games
lost their importance in the world where we live in
. I support Change preposition
apply
this
point of view for two main reasons.
To commence with the first reason, these games
represent an excellent way to bring people
together. Indeed, it is very common for families or friends to watch Olympic
Correct article usage
the Olympic
games
together,
Remove the comma
apply
while
having lunch or dinner for example
. In addition
to that, Olympics
manage to gather Correct article usage
the Olympics
people
together at a more profound level, by awakening and enhancing strong feelings of patriotism and brotherhood among citizens. For instance
, when last
year an Italian athlete won the 100 mt Olympic
race, we were all very proud of him, but especially we were proud of being Italians.
Turning to the second motivation, Olympics
represents a good method to increase and improve local economies. Correct article usage
the Olympics
This
is due to
the fact that host cities usually invest huge amounts of money to improve their facilities, such
as stadiums or swimming pools. As a consequence
of government's
investments, lots of new job places are created. Correct article usage
the government's
Moreover
, local economies can thrive also
due to
the increased levels of tourism, which is typical during the Olympic
period. For instance
, all hotels and restaurants in host cities and nearby are always fully booked.
To conclude
, even though some people
consider Correct article usage
the Olympics
Olympics
Correct your spelling
Olympic
games
useless nowadays, I still believe they have a big relevance for both people
and countries. These games
are still a wonderful occasion that we can use to celebrate our countries's
success. Fix the agreement mistake
country's
Furthermore
, thanks to local
government's investments and the increased levels of tourism, local economies will flourish during the Correct article usage
the local
Olympic
season.Submitted by lucrezia.giunta97 on
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task achievement
To improve task achievement, incorporate a counter-argument to show acknowledgment of the opposing viewpoint, and then refute it to strengthen your stance.
task achievement
Consider varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your essay effectively includes both an introduction and a conclusion which frames your argument well.
task achievement
The main points are well-supported with specific and relevant examples, which strengthens your argument.
task achievement
You've clearly presented your opinion and supported it with logical reasoning, which contributes to task achievement.
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