IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give you own opinion.

It is undeniable that globalisation nowadays has led to the spread of
information
Use synonyms
 across the globe . While some people think it is favourable to share
advances
Use synonyms
 about scientific research ,
Use synonyms
business
Correct article usage
the business
show examples
world
Use synonyms
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
academics , others argue that some of
those
Change the determiner
that information
show examples
information
Use synonyms
 are highly precious to be publicly announced . In the following essay , both views will be investigated thoroughly and l will show my support to the former . On the one hand , there are myriad disadvantages of allowing critical
information
Use synonyms
 to be known for free . The most important of which is that those pieces of
information
Use synonyms
 will be misused if they fall in the wrong hands ,
in particular
Linking Words
 , scientific
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
 and academic
world
Use synonyms
advances
Use synonyms
 ,
consequently
Linking Words
 , disasters might occur .
For example
Linking Words
, in the
second
Linking Words
world
Use synonyms
 war leakage of nuclear recent knowledge brought about detrimental consequences .
Moreover
Linking Words
 , details about businesses and the stock can contribute to
elevate
Change the verb form
elevating
show examples
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
show examples
 economy even though those details might be used adversely in the stock market .
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , public sharing of certain
information
Use synonyms
 help increase
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
 among nations .
This
Linking Words
 is
becaue
Correct your spelling
because
 when the society members are being informed by updated
advances
Use synonyms
 in science ,
business
Use synonyms
 , and
academic
Correct article usage
the academic
show examples
world
Use synonyms
 , they tend to be positive members
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the community .
for instance
Linking Words
 , in order to promote trade in Egypt and motivate people to start their own small businesses , the government usually publishes freely up to date details about how to cope with the recent
business
Use synonyms
world
Use synonyms
 and gain profits. I believe that for a nation to
develope
Correct your spelling
develop
 not only do
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 have to search for new innovative
approches
Correct your spelling
approaches
 but they must
also
Linking Words
 be informed
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the recent
advances
Use synonyms
 by their governments . in conclusion ,
although
Linking Words
 there are ideas that support the notion that scientific and
business
Use synonyms
information
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 greatly valuable to be shared for free as it is not known who will use them appropriately , counteract ideas propose that in order that
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
 prevail ,
those
Change the determiner
that information
show examples
information
Use synonyms
 must be published ,
however
Linking Words
 , I believe that rationalization and wisdom are the
key
Change the noun form
keys
show examples
 to
determine
Change the verb form
determining
show examples
 whether to publish or not .

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
What to do next:
Look at other essays: