Investment in local amenities such as leisure centres is the best way for the government to foster a good community spirit. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Community
Use synonyms
spirit
Use synonyms
thrives on shared spaces and activities, and
while
Linking Words
investment in local
amenities
Use synonyms
like
leisure
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
undoubtedly contributes to
this
Linking Words
, I believe it's just one facet of fostering a strong communal bond. I will explore the significance of
such
Linking Words
investments and propose additional measures to enhance
community
Use synonyms
cohesion. Investing in local
amenities
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as
leisure
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
plays a pivotal role in strengthening
community
Use synonyms
ties. These spaces offer platforms for diverse social interactions, promoting inclusivity and bonding among residents.
For instance
Linking Words
, in my hometown, the renovation of a neglected park into a vibrant
community
Use synonyms
hub resulted in increased social gatherings, sports events, and cultural exchanges.
However
Linking Words
, solely relying on
leisure
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
may not address all aspects crucial for
community
Use synonyms
spirit
Use synonyms
. Diversification of
community
Use synonyms
-centric initiatives beyond
amenities
Use synonyms
is essential. The government can encourage volunteer programs, cultural festivals, and educational workshops, fostering deeper connections among citizens.
For instance
Linking Words
, implementing a
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
show examples
watch program not only enhances safety but
also
Linking Words
cultivates a sense of shared responsibility and unity.
Moreover
Linking Words
, initiatives like
community
Use synonyms
gardens or local art projects encourage collaboration and pride in shared spaces,
further
Linking Words
bolstering
community
Use synonyms
spirit
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
to investments, policies promoting inclusivity and equal access are indispensable. Subsidized or free access to these
amenities
Use synonyms
ensures that all members of society can participate, irrespective of socio-economic backgrounds.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, fostering dialogue platforms where diverse voices are heard encourages mutual understanding and respect.
For example
Linking Words
, town hall meetings or online forums facilitate discussions on
community
Use synonyms
issues, leading to collective problem-solving and strengthened unity. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
investments in local
amenities
Use synonyms
like
leisure
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
are instrumental in fostering
community
Use synonyms
spirit
Use synonyms
, a holistic approach incorporating diverse initiatives and inclusive policies is vital. By embracing a multifaceted strategy, governments can cultivate stronger
community
Use synonyms
bonds, ensuring that every individual feels a sense of belonging and actively contributes to the collective well-being. Ultimately, it is the amalgamation of various measures that will truly nurture a thriving and cohesive
community
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay exhibits a strong logical structure, coherently linking ideas with clear progression throughout paragraphs. To further improve, ensure transitional phrases are varied and seamlessly connect the content.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both clearly articulated, effectively framing the essay. For perfection, make sure your thesis statement is explicit and your conclusion reiterates your opinion without introducing new ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are well-supported with explanations, however, the use of specific examples could be more pronounced. Real-life instances add credibility and weight to your arguments, so aim to include these whenever possible.
task achievement
The essay provides a comprehensive response to the task with well-elaborated explanations. Nevertheless, to elevate your score further, ensure that all parts of the prompt are addressed with equal emphasis and depth. This includes discussing the extent to which you agree or disagree with the given statement.
task achievement
The clear presentation of ideas and in-depth exploration shows excellent comprehension of the topic. Continue to develop complex ideas in a structured manner.
task achievement
Examples used in the essay are pertinent, but they could be bolstered with more specific, varied, and detailed illustrations. This would enhance your argument's persuasion and better demonstrate understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster
  • ammunities
  • leisure centre
  • sense of togetherness
  • boost the local economy
  • inclusive events
  • diverse range
  • instil a sense of pride
  • shared identity
  • accessibility and connectivity
  • public green spaces
  • community bonding
  • frequent community service projects
  • community-based educational programs
  • promotes physical health
What to do next:
Look at other essays: