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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people suggest that young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the advantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this .

#people #job #years #school #university
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It is considered by some
people
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 that allowing
children
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 to have a career during the study in a school and university for a few years may have positive results.In my opinion,giving
students
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 opportunities to
work
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 since they have studied provides both benefits and drawbacks.The following cases and examples below will help support my point of view. On the one hand,
students
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 who
work
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 and study at the same
time
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 are received soft skills and experience before having a permanent job when they graduate.
In other words
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,they get a chance to develop and improve their capacities and attitudes.
For example
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,some
students
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 who study in the faculty of medicine,they are acquired experience from doctors shadowing in the hospital.On top of that,they
work
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 with doctors to help patients and
this
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 can encourage their decision to become a physician in the future.
Therefore
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,
children
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 can completely know at an early age which is the most appropriate occupation for them.Another reason is that some
children
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 have problems with finances,so if they have a part-
time
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 job,they will gain salary to expenditure in daily life without disturbing their parents.
Moreover
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,they are pleased and satisfied with their abilities.
On the other hand
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,other
people
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 may think that providing
work
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 for
students
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 causes many disadvantages.
Firstly
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children
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 may lack concentration during the class because they are anxious about their job.
Moreover
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,it will increase
students
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' stress if they have to do two things at one
time
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.
Furthermore
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,companies may exploit
students
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 by giving lots of
work
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 or reducing wages. Focusing on
children
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's free
time
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, they may lose their leisure
time
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 for relaxing or having dinner with friends or family.
However
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,they have to spend more
time
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 working since they were a teenager. In conclusion,it is argued by some
people
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 that getting
students
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 to have an occupation seems to be adverse outcomes.
However
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,In my view,I strongly believe that providing chances for young
people
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 to get to know about their career early is the most effective way.The cases and examples above have supported my point of view to the best.
Submitted by nopcharai.si on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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