IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Every year an increasing number of students choose to go to another country for their higher education. Do you think the benefits of this development outweigh the problems associated with it?

#year #students #country #education #development
These days, the number of
students
 who want to study at foreign universities is rising gradually. Some people may think that there are more advantages of
this
 trend than disadvantages,
however
, others may believe that the drawbacks outweigh the benefits of
this
 development. In my opinion,
although
 it can be found the positive aspects in the trend, there are slightly more negative aspects in student’s taking higher education in the different
countries
 from their own.
To begin
 with, for each student, nobody can deny one of the most important benefits of studying
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 different
countries
 is knowing the different cultures. For
students
, diversity enables them to find their identities and,
as a result
,
students
 will be able to understand a wide range of phenomena from different viewpoints.
Furthermore
, when
students
 go back to their home
country
, they would return their knowledge to society.
However
,
conversely
, there are some risks that
students
 who have studied in foreign
countries
 start to work in the
country
. Specifically, if
students
 cannot utilize the knowledge which they learn a foreign
country
 in their home
country
, they are more likely to remain in the
country
 where they took a higher education
Furthermore
, people who have a strong ambition to study abroad might want to develop their skills in the better environment, and typically, an environment in
countries
 which can offer a higher education would be better than
countries
 which cannot. In conclusion, I believe that the drawbacks of studying foreign
countries
 slightly outweigh the benefits, in terms of returning profits to home society.
Submitted by hayamiosaki on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!