Some people argue that spending a lot of money holding birthday parties, wedding parties and other celebration is a waste of money. However, others believe such parties are important for individuals and for society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #money #birthday #parties #celebration #waste #individuals #society

It is argued that an abundance of

money

which is being spent on marriages, birthday

celebrations

and other functions is not

Remove the article

apply

show examples

worth

Correct pronoun usage

itworth

show examples

. And, I totally agree.

Nevertheless

, some people oppose

this

view. So,

this

essay will elaborate

about

Change preposition

show examples

it in detail. To commence with, in

this

era of materialism, there are, still, many persons who believe in doing intellectual things. To illustrate, they do not prefer to invest their worthwhile

money

in the

celebrations

. Because, there are

also

other options which are really imperative for the society,

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

various human rights save their capital for future plannings like education as well as great upbringing of their offsprings.

In addition

such

individuals invest it as

charity

Add an article

a charity

show examples

, too. For the reason that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

they know the actual value of their earnings and

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

appropriate use.

On the contrary

, we have some masses who spend their cash, without thinking, on the

celebrations

. There are miscellaneous causes for

this

For instance

, high standards of living amongst their relatives and friends. Apart from

this

, they consider

such

materialistic activities much

indispensable

Correct quantifier usage

more indispensable

show examples

than individualism.

Therefore

, folks consider it as an essential part of life for themselves and their communities, because they want to make their special events of life memorable for everyone. To sum up, I would like to conclude that,

although

it may be quite crucial for a myriad number of people to celebrate their personal occasions, but, for several persons, investing their

money

in an intelligent way is more pivotal because they think that

celebrations

are a waste of

money

Submitted by Toni R on Fri Mar 25 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Is this a positive or negative development?
In recent years, advancements in technology have changed how people connect with each other. This has turned people into making much more friends but has also reduced the depth of those relationships. In my opinion, this is a harmful change due to the fact that it makes humans less able to communicate their personal feelings.
<4
band
These days, too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle.
Nowadays, health is Kept by the majority of people through reliance on doctors and medications, rather than by fallowing a healthy living. I hold the opinion that this trend happens as new ways of treatment are appearing each year, and visiting a docter is much easier than maintaining a balanced IPestyle. It is significant to take a close look at some main causes.
4.5
band
Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve our mind health, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest our mind during leisure time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Mental well-being is also very important as the physical health, as it helps you think critically in difficult situations. Few people think that enjoyment activities are important for us whereas, other group says that we should take a break from all these things to get relaxed. I completely agree with the group that says we should provide complete break to our mind so that we can rest well. In the forthcoming paragraph, I will describe some points to justify my opinion.
6
band
1.You and your brother have decided to go for a holiday but due to some reason, your brother is not able to join you for holiday. Write a letter to your friend to invite him/her for holiday. Give detail plan of vacation. State reason why your brother will not come with you. Invite your friend.
I hope you are sailing in the boat of good health. I am writing you this missive to invite you for a vacation which initially I planned with my brother. He is unable to join me due to his last minute call from his office for the project, he has been working diligently from past six months. Although, he made sure of completing it before this holiday but could not do so. Thus, he has canceled his plans.
7.5
band
An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops.What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping center rather than smaller, more traditional shops? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
It is contended that the massive resurgence of modern supermarkets is the main factor affecting citizen interests in traditional markets. This essay will elaborate on why I staunchly endorse the argument, including the advantages and disadvantages of buying goods in a supermarket reviewed from a price and stuff availability perspective.

Some people argue that spending a lot of money holding birthday parties, wedding parties and other celebration is a waste of money. However, others believe such parties are important for individuals and for society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Is this a positive or negative development?

These days, too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle.

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve our mind health, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest our mind during leisure time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

1.You and your brother have decided to go for a holiday but due to some reason, your brother is not able to join you for holiday. Write a letter to your friend to invite him/her for holiday. Give detail plan of vacation. State reason why your brother will not come with you. Invite your friend.