IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You caused some damage to the kitchen area of your flat. Write a letter to your landlord explaining the following. •How the damage occurred •The extent of damage •What you would like to landlord to do.

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I am writing to apologize for the damage I accidentally caused in the kitchen. I am Mandeep Singh, your tenant from apartment 07
western street
Correct your spelling
Western Street
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. I moved into your apartment about 15 days ago from India. I was not aware of the smoke alarm system. I started making parantha,
as
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an
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 Indian flatbread, which needs some frying. All of a sudden, the smoke alarm started beeping and would not stop. In a panic, I tried to remove it, and its screw broke & it came off. The damage is not very major, but it needs immediate attention as I know it would be risky to use the kitchen without the smoke alarm. It would be very kind of you if you could get
this
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 problem caused by me. I will be cautious in the future that
such
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 mishaps do not occur. Hoping for a kind consideration from you Yours faithfully Mandeep Singh

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task response
Provide more details on the extent of the damage caused. Specifically, mention how the smoke alarm system was damaged and whether there was any other damage to the kitchen.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate but could be improved by using more formal language and addressing the landlord directly (e.g., Dear Mr./Ms. [Landlord's Last Name],)

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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