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Band 5

It is a good idea for teenagers to have jobs while they are still students. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Support your answer with specific reasons and details.

#idea #teenagers #jobs #students #support
Part-time
jobs
 are very overwhelming in the world of today where higher education has become sky-high.
However
, some people argue that students should focus more on their
studies
 rather than doing work. Yet, I think
half - time
Correct your spelling
half-time
show examples
jobs
 are important for scholars in order to teach them responsibilities and the value of money.
To begin
 with, the teens can learn how to be responsible, punctual and manage their time effectively while doing part-time
jobs
.
For instance
, while working, it is their sole responsibility to report on time and do the duties properly. By
this
, specific skills are learnt by the young people which will help them in the near future.
In addition
, the pupils will be able to unearth the value of money. They will spend less unnecessarily and
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
show examples
 even capable to pay their necessities and bills. They can even fund
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their higher education.
For instance
, the youngsters will think twice before paying
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 unnecessary items because even the small amount of money they get is of utmost importance. They will focus more on
budget
Correct article usage
the budget
show examples
.
Hence
,
this
 attitude will make them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
become better individuals.
Therefore
, part-time employment is a great notion.
However
, some people argue that the students should focus only on their
studies
. They claim that the scholars will get easily distracted from their
studies
 while doing temporary
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 and score poor grades in academics. But, today's teenagers are very intelligent and wise. They know how to manage
studies
 along with their
jobs
. In brief, doing part-time
jobs
 while studying is an excellent idea to be brought up to students worldwide. It is one of the best ways to get trained for difficulties.
Therefore
, it is hoped that
this
 will benefit them to brighten up their future.
Submitted by josestephy1 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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