In some countries, young people have become richer, healthier, and live longer, but they are less happy. What are the causes? What can be done to address this situation?

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In recent times, despite significant advancements in health, wealth, and longevity, many young
people
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in certain countries report feeling less happy than previous
generations
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. A major reason behind
this
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paradox is the over-convenience brought by modern technology, which has reshaped young
people
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's perception of success and
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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.
This
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essay agrees with
this
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view and suggests that public awareness campaigns and targeted government
policies
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could help address the issue.
To begin
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with, the rise of technology and artificial intelligence has made life remarkably convenient, especially for younger
generations
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.
While
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this
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progress has eliminated many daily struggles, it has
also
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reduced opportunities for meaningful effort and personal growth.
For instance
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, educational resources, entertainment, and even social interactions are readily available online, requiring minimal effort.
As a result
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, young
people
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may lose appreciation for small achievements, leading to a diminished sense of purpose and satisfaction. Unlike previous
generations
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, who often found happiness in overcoming hardship, modern youth are more likely to feel unfulfilled despite material comfort. To tackle
this
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issue, a combination of parental involvement and governmental action is essential. Awareness campaigns aimed at parents and educators can encourage healthier values,
such
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as gratitude, resilience, and delayed gratification. At the same time, governments can implement educational reforms that promote emotional intelligence and mental well-being alongside academic achievement.
Policies
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that regulate excessive screen time in schools or encourage outdoor and community-based activities could
also
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help reintroduce a sense of real-world engagement and achievement. In more ambitious terms, governments could even explore
policies
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that address over-reliance on technology,
such
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as encouraging tech-free zones in public spaces. In conclusion, the decline in happiness among young
people
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can largely be attributed to the ease and over-simplification of modern life, which reduces appreciation for everyday achievements. By raising public awareness and implementing thoughtful
policies
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, governments and communities can help younger
generations
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rediscover a more fulfilling and balanced approach to life.

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly outlines the main argument and sets the stage for the discussion, which is excellent. However, you could make your thesis statement even more explicit by summarizing the main causes briefly.
coherence and cohesion
The overall structure is logical and easy to follow, which is great. It might be beneficial to use more varied linking words to enhance the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples that support your points well. To strengthen your argument, consider integrating more specific statistics or studies related to happiness and technology's impact.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your points and reinforces your argument. Consider restating the importance of addressing the issue in a more compelling way to leave a lasting impression.
coherence and cohesion
The essay presents a clear argument and maintains a logical progression of ideas throughout.
task achievement
You demonstrated a good understanding of the topic and included relevant ideas, showing a thoughtful approach to the issue at hand.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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