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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people think that the news media nowadays have influenced people‘s lives in negative ways. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #news #media #people‘s #lives
To some
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 disagree with the fact that
news
media
 nowadays have influenced
people
's lives in a negative way.The purpose of
news
media
 is to update us on what is happening around the
world
, yes in some
instance
Fix the agreement mistake
instances
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 they might not be true facts but mostly we will know what is happening.
Also
 listening to
media
news
 help
people
 to be alert and know what to do and how
react
Add the particle
to react
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 to certain circumstances. There
is
Change the verb form
are
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 so
much
Change the quantifier
many
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 things happening around the
world
 and the only way we might know about them is through
media
news
. A good example now is the war between Ukraine and Russia, if
media
news
 was not active, we would have not been having details of what is happening, each and every day,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 log
and
Correct word choice
apply
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into the
media
news
 and check the updates, not only me
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but so many
people
 around the
world
.
News
media
 keeps the
people
 alert the good example is
whats
Correct your spelling
what's
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happenning
Correct your spelling
happening
 with global warming, we have to be updated, stay alert and know what to do and how to do it to
saved
Change the form of the verb
save
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 our environment.
The
Change preposition
For the
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 past three years the whole
world
 was affected by the effects of covid, it was only through
media
news
 that we were updated and kept alert to the
extend
Replace the word
extent
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 that we knew what to do and how to do to preserve lives. In
summary
Add a comma
,summary
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i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 tend to disagree
to
Change preposition
with
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 the fact that
news
media
 influence
people
 in a negative way. I would to some
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
 motivate as many
people
 as
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 can to listen
or
Change preposition
to or
show examples
 read
media
news
.
Submitted by gorerazaeasther on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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