IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

When a country develops its technology, the traditional skils and ways of life die out. It is pontless to try and keep them alive. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

#country #technology #skils #life #pontless
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There is no doubt that the development of
technology
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 is highly important for every country now.
However
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, some
people
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 say that it leads to the destruction of traditional lifestyles and skills. In my opinion,
technology
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 improves our way of living, but cannot completely destroy traditional skills and way of
life
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. We live in a world in which modern technologies are used popularly in different spheres like medicine, building, transportation and many others. Its development is mainly aimed
to make
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at making
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 our
day to day
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day-to-day
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life
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 more convenient as modern
life
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 is extremely fast and
people
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 may not have time for some simple tasks.
For example
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, robots, vacuuming the floor, are really popular nowadays.
Moreover
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, robots are commonly used by companies as they tend to produce products faster than
people
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, though, they are controlled by folks.
On the other hand
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, there are a number of communities that do not introduce
technology
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 into their
life
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,
hence
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, saving their conservative lifestyle. They
also
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 live isolated and usually do not communicate a lot with others. At the same time, with technological progress, traditional skills
such
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 as carving or painting became more valuable. In fact,
people
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 prefer to spend more on crafts that were made by hand, especially if it is related to their traditions and culture. In conclusion,
it is clear that
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 the development of
technology
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 and the increase in its use in all spheres has an influence on our lifestyle.
Nevertheless
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, some
people
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 still prefer the conservative kind of
life
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 and traditional handicrafts are highly valued by modern society.
Submitted by tn.trannhan68 on

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task response
Ensure that your ideas directly respond to the given prompt and develop them fully. Use specific examples to support your points and consider different perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical and clear structure. Try to use a wider range of linking devices to show the connections between your ideas more clearly.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary by using a wider range of synonyms and idiomatic expressions. Make sure your word choices are appropriate for the formal register of academic writing.
grammatical range
Your grammar is generally accurate, but be mindful of complex sentence structures and more varied sentence patterns to showcase a wider range of grammatical structures.
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