In the 20th century, contact between many different parts of the world has developed rapidly through air travel and telecommunications. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Through air travel and telecommunications, the relationship between many
countries
are grew
fast in Change the verb form
are growing
20th
century. Change the article
the 20th
Although
this
will weaken the national culture and traditions, I believe that the advantages will outweigh the drawbacks because it will help industries expands their trade
and increase
world economic growth.
People are travel more using airplane
and Fix the agreement mistake
airplanes
this
may harm the tradition and culture which already exist in that country. Youngers tend to adapt fast with
Change preposition
to
new
Add an article
the new
trend
and think that the traditional cultures are ancient. Fix the agreement mistake
trends
For example
, Indonesia has hundreds of local languages and culture
, Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
such
as Saman
Correct article usage
the Saman
dance
from Aceh Province. On the other hand
, K-Pop
industries which are popular around the world impact on
the loss of that traditional Change preposition
apply
dance
. Most of youngers population in Indonesia love that
Correct word choice
apply
K-Pop
song
, Fix the agreement mistake
songs
K-Pop
dance
and they travel a lot to Korea to watch the Fix the agreement mistake
dances
K-Pop
concert and they do not have interested to learn the traditional dance
. However
, I believe that the connection between countries
will increase
the growth of international trade
and improve national GDP across the nations.
The advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
from
contact between Change preposition
of
countries
is
that Change the verb form
are
this
will increase
the
international Correct article usage
apply
trade
and this
will impact to
the import and export Change preposition
apply
local
product across the nations. Change preposition
of local
This
international trade
will increase
national
GDP because the value of the goods will raise due to the commodity export. Correct article usage
the national
For example
, many local products such
as rattan furniture in Bali has been exported to America and Europe and the price are
much higher rather than Change the verb form
is
sold
locally.
In conclusion, Correct pronoun usage
those sold
although
it might be affect
the traditional cultures, the growth of contact between many Change the verb form
affect
countries
will increase
international trade
and will raise national GDP. For these reasons, the advantages far outnumber the drawbacks.Submitted by ririsgrace on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite