A large number of advertisements nowadays are now targeted at children. Many people say this has negative effects on children and should therefore be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people argued that a huge proportion of
advertisements
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these days are now targeted at young people. And they believe that there are various negative impacts on
children
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that should be prohibited. Personally, I partly disagree with
this
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idea. On the one hand, it is true that commercials nowadays had an effect on
children
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.
For example
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, some products are promoted unhealthy foods and beverages which can lead to physical health problems in younger
children
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such
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as obesity, diabetes and dyspepsia.
Furthermore
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, some products in terms of entertainment
such
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as toys and games are costly, which could cause conflict between
parents
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and their
children
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when
children
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asked for their playthings and
parents
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denied to purchasing them.
However
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, I disagree with the idea that
advertisements
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should be banned. Because in the modern world, economic progress is a significant factor in developing countries. Advertisement is the primary need for promoting a company’s products to people. Banning
advertisements
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may reduce sales opportunities and lead to an economic downturn. In my opinion, a good parental role is more important to tackle
this
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problem,
for example
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,
parents
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should teach their
children
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how to spend their money and what to do in their free time. I think it is the easiest way to protect
children
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from
advertisements
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in the materialistic world. In conclusion, While I recognize the possible disadvantages of a large proportion of commercials that harm
children
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both physical health and mental health, I consider it is the responsibility of
parents
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rather than companies to teach their offspring about financial planning and provide them with healthy foods.
Submitted by beamisveryhappy on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • materialism
  • exaggerated claims
  • unrealistic expectations
  • dietary habits
  • obesity
  • creativity
  • awareness-raising ads
  • regulated content
  • mental well-being
  • physical well-being
  • beneficial content
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