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Nowadays, a lot of offices employ open-space designs instead of separate rooms for work. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#offices #open-space #designs #rooms #work #outweigh
Currently, many workplaces have had coworking spaces as a replacement for isolated rooms. Even though
this
 development gives immense benefits in cost savings, increased teamwork and creativity efficiency, it
also
 presents many drawbacks
such
 as a lack of privacy, concentration, and health safety.
This
 essay outlines the pros and cons of using open spaces in lieu of private rooms for
work
.
Initially
, the foremost upside is that opening design for
working
Correct article usage
the working
show examples
 environment enhances teamwork efficiency and creativity.
In other words
, using a shared workspace gives members of a team more opportunities to share their ideas, connect and build relationships.
Consequently
, designing open spaces in offices can reduce the cost of many materials.
For instance
, some materials including partition construction can be cut off and the amount of equipment
such
 as lights and air conditioners is
also
 reduced. As far as disadvantages are concerned, an open-space workplace might cause a lack of privacy during working time. That means employees can move around freely, easily see the
work
 screens, and watch others.
Additionally
, the staff can be distracted occasionally which usually leads to low productivity.
Furthermore
 ,
this
 kind of workplace in many cases has some negative effects on employees’ health. The reason is that there are various kinds of respiratory diseases and dermatological diseases which usually spread in crowded environments or through sharing office supplies. In conclusion,
although
 there are some drawbacks to
this
 approach, the upsides of
work
 efficiency and the promotion of creativity are clear. That can be an option for many companies to improve the quality of
work
.
Submitted by narcissus.thuytien4624 on

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Introduction & Conclusion Structure
Your introduction and conclusion are both present and clear, effectively establishing your position and summarizing your main points. However, you could improve by offering a clearer signal of your essay's structure in the introduction and providing a more impactful final statement in the conclusion to leave a lasting impression on the reader.
Task Achievement - Idea Development
While you have constructed main points that generally relate to the task, your response would become more compelling with greater development of these ideas. Offering more depth in your arguments, such as elaborating further on how open spaces influence teamwork and creativity or providing more detailed examples of costs savings, could strengthen your response significantly.
Coherence & Cohesion - Cohesive Devices
The coherence of your essay is adequate, with paragraphs that logically flow from one to the next. However, the cohesion could be enhanced by better use of cohesive devices. Words or phrases that connect ideas, paragraphs, and sections would help make your argumentation more seamless and improve the reader's understanding of the logical progression of your thoughts.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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