IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The following essay talks about the numerous advantages of governments spending money on public transport infrastructure rather than building more roads. I fully agree that urban planners should prioritize building a high-speed rail network
instead
Linking Words
 of building highways. The main benefit of building railway infrastructure is that it saves a lot of money for every individual. Recent studies have shown that each household spends more than 20% of its annual income on purchasing fuel and vehicle insurance. These expenditures can easily be avoided when using a public medium of transit.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the amount of time every individual can save by taking public transport rather than using their own car. People spend more than 2 hours commuting to their work every single day by using personal vehicles
due to
Linking Words
 bad traffic congestion.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, that time can be used for reading books and spending quality time with family.
For example
Linking Words
, Japan has shown the entire world that a fast and efficient high-speed rail network can be built successfully. Every other nation should follow Japan's city design principles to create better neighbourhoods.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, another advantage is that a reduction in private vehicle usage on the roads leads to better air quality. The carbon dioxide released from cars alone amounts to more than half of the total greenhouse gas emissions.
Due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, everyone has an increased risk of suffering from lung diseases. The healthcare systems around the world have already been under pressure
due to
Linking Words
 other
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
 illnesses
such
Linking Words
 as diabetes and heart disease.
As a result
Linking Words
, health insurance premiums are on the rise and the number of people who can afford it is on the decline. With increasing spending on public infrastructure, the
overall
Linking Words
 health of the nation can be greatly improved. In conclusion, I totally agree that
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments should increase their spending on investing in sustainable transport options as it will lead to a better environment and healthier life for all the participants.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response - Complete Response
Ensure that each paragraph is clearly structured with a topic sentence and supporting details. Make sure to address all parts of the essay prompt in your response.
Coherence and Cohesion - Logical Structure
Improve coherence by utilizing transition words and phrases to connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs. Ensure that the ideas flow logically throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion - Introduction and Conclusion Present
Include a clear introduction that introduces the topic and a conclusion that summarizes the main points and restates the thesis statement. This will enhance the overall structure of your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
What to do next:
Look at other essays: