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Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Media nd news show crimes and news which case fear and provoke culprit.Some people think that crime news on tv should not be broadcasted. To wat extent do you agree or disagree.

#media #news #show #crimes #case #fear #culprit #people #crime #tv #wat
Mass communication show unlawful acts on
television
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 cause unpleasant feelings and anger in
offenders
.Other
people
 believe that unlawful acts on
television
 should not be aired .In my opinion ,I disagree that unlawful acts should not be broadcasted.
However
, they should because it will alert
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society about what is happening. To a lesser extent , crime news should not be broadcasted.
This
 is because it causes unpleasant feelings and
instigate
Change the verb form
instigates
show examples
offenders
 .Many
people
 are not comfortable watching bad things on tv,it promotes instant fear and uncomfortable situation.Broadcasting crime on
television
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
makes
offenders
 angry because they don't like to
Add a missing verb
be exposed
show examples
exposed
Change the form of the verb
expose
show examples
.
For example
, when there was a bank robbery ,and they managed to escape ,they get angry because they are looking for them.
On the other hand
, to a greater extent crimes should be broadcasted because the
people
 should be alerted about what is happening around them
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that they will take extra
precaution
Fix the agreement mistake
precautions
show examples
.Broadcasting on
television
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
 example, a wanted person ,
people
 will know that someone dangerous is on the loose.
As a result
, everyone is going to be alert. In my opinion,crime news should be aired because it will notify
people
 about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
what is happening around them. In conclusion,mass communication causes unpleasant feelings and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
makes
offenders
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
be angry .

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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