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Writing Samples
Band 6

In some countries, men and women are having children late in life. What are the reasons for this development? Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

#countries #men #women #children #life #development #outweigh
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There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate over males and females having
children
Use synonyms
 late
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 becoming ubiquitous in some nations.
This
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 essay is devoted to underlying justifications and analyzing both the pros and cons of the mentioned discus perspective. Without a shadow of a doubt, there are abundant roots to pin down that in some countries, men and women delay having
children
Use synonyms
 soon in their
life
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. One of them is that
people
Use synonyms
 are too hectic and spend most of their time earning money, so they do not take care of their infants. What’s more, marriage later is
also
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 a better security condition for
children
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’s future, because
people
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 can concentrate on work to have good finances or expand their experience before living with someone and having
children
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.
For example
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, according to the article of Vietnam, the fee to nurture one child from 0 to 18 years old is merely some billion VNĐ, it
also
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 depends on other factors
such
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 as facilities good or bad, but that money is
unavaiable
Correct your spelling
unavailable
available
 to everyone.
Hence
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, before men and women decide on having
children
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, it relies on considerable reasons. While the redeeming features of the roots
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
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 development are widely acknowledged, it is unfair if those
of
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apply
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negative effects on the society, in their
Use synonyms
life
Add the comma(s)
,life
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 are neglected.
Although
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 men and women delay having toddlers in their
life
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 can help them have sustainable financial, stable jobs, it
also
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 leads to certain disadvantages
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the society
such
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 as
Correct article usage
an aging
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aging
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ageing
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 population, lack of human resources and
children
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 are easily prone to some diseases.
For instance
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, Japan is one of the nations that have
the
Correct article usage
a
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 number of elderly
people
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 higher than that of younger
people
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, so it leads to
shortage
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a shortage
the shortage
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 of
labor
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labour
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 workforce,
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 amount of cost for
older
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the older
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 fund,
burden
Add an article
the burden
a burden
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in
Change preposition
on
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 the medical.
Thus
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, it is believed that the benefit of
this
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 statement cannot overshadow its counterparts. In my conclusion, despite having a wide range of roots to pin down that males and females decide on having toddlers late in
life
Use synonyms
, it is undeniable that
this
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 development does more harm than good.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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