IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Fast food has become more common in recent years. Some people think that it has a negative effect on lifestyles and diets. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #years #people #effect #lifestyles #diets
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Processed
food
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 has gained
significantly
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a significantly
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 large amount of popularity in recent years.
People
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 argue that they pose
as
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apply
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a threat to individual lifestyles and diets. Personally, I agree with
matter
Correct article usage
the matter
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 and the results of consuming
large
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a large
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amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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 of fast
food
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 can lead to health implications and social barriers for an individual. Processed
food
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 can lead to many significant health issues
such
Linking Words
 as obesity and can often escalate rapidly.
For example
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, there are high levels of saturated fat and salt within a meal. Consistently consuming them can cause
to
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apply
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deterioration in fitness levels if not taken care of properly.
Subsequently
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,
this
Linking Words
 leads to
people
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 gaining weight at a faster rate than the average person.
Moreover
Linking Words
, having a body size larger than a typical person as a consequence of overconsuming junk
food
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 can lead to social barriers. Many
people
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 with a kind of overweight body size often find themselves under lots of pressure from
people
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 surrounding them telling them to lose weight.
This
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 can lead to less confidence in an individual. Over time,
this
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 accumulates and
eventually
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,eventually
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 they may have an increase in stress levels due to immense expectations from
people
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 they know. In conclusion, consuming a significant amount of fast
food
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 can lead to health-related issues
such
Linking Words
 as obesity. At the same time, individuals who eat processed
food
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 become more reluctant to attend social events due to the impressions they may receive.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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