IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

some people say that all young people should have full-time education until they are 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Educating
youngesters
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youngsters
have
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has
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 evolved into a major topic of concern in
this
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 era. Few
of
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apply
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people
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 claim that it is should be obligatory for the youth to
recive
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receive
 a full-time
education
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 until they are 18 years old.
This
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 essay will argue why educating full time is entirely necessary for young
people
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 under 18 years old.
Firstly
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, youngsters who received a
full time
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full-time
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education
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 have opportunities to
exapand
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expand
 their
knowldge
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knowledge
.
for example
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,
people
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 spend most of their time in class learning about different areas
such
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 as history, maths or literature.
As a result
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, they would
aquire
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require
acquire
 a huge amount of
commom
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common
 knowledge, which not only helps them in archiving higher academic performances
,
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apply
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 but
also
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 possibly give them innumerable chances to solve complicated problems in daily life.
In addition
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, a full-time
education
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 can act as a deterrent to young
people
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 from witnessing violent actions or negative habits on the internet.
In other words
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, the deleterious content on the internet could adversely affect individuals who are under 18 years
also
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 because they are mentally vulnerable. Indeed, there
are
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apply
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have been some recorded instances of unfortunate violent
vidoes
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videos
 which are being widely spread. Those clips contained violent content and
challenges
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challenged
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to
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apply
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the audiences to do
as
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apply
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what they see as they do not have a fully
congitive
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cognitive
 development. To sum up,
this
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 essay argues whether it is necessary for youngsters to receive
a
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apply
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full-time
education
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.In my opinion, as
such
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,is imperative due to the advantages which it offers is a chance to broaden the youngs horizons and raising in their awareness.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • comprehensive education
  • intellectual growth
  • emotional growth
  • social growth
  • evolving job market
  • specialized knowledge
  • extended education
  • reducing inequality
  • essential competencies
  • vocational training
  • economic impact
  • financial constraints
  • infrastructure
  • stress and burnout
  • personal aspirations
  • career aspirations
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