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Band 8

Nowadays technology is increasingly being uswd to monitor what people are saying or doing. So you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#technology #uswd #people #development
Without a doubt technology has made our lives easier,
however
, in recent times it is been used to spy on
people
's conversations and activities.
Although
this
 makes the general public lose trust in the
government
, I believe the helps to improve the security of a country against enemies at home and abroad. On the one hand, the main detrimental effect of using technology to monitor
people
's whereabouts and what they are doing is that it makes them paranoid about their
government
.
This
 is because they feel they can be manipulated with the information that
people
 might have heard about them,
therefore
 they might not cooperate with new rules and regulations in their society even to their own detriment.
For instance
, in Russia, some persons refused to get vaccinated against the covid virus, because they feel their
government
 knew that they were against the current
government
. As
this
 was just a way to kill them.
However
, despite
this
 drawback, the benefits of being able to track and terminate potential threats to a country are far superior.
This
 is because ,with the help of artificial intelligence computers, mobile phones, messages and calls can be monitored, tracked and traced to a specific location,
thus
 making it easier to capture criminals.
For example
, France intelligence Units were able to avert a planned terrorist attack on their airport two years ago.
This
 was achieved following three-month surveillance of the laptop of the terrorist
,
Remove the comma
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 after his computer was flagged by the artificial intelligence while using the internet, and
subsequently
 arrested at his home.
As a result
 of
this
, a lot of lives were saved and
this
 goes to show the importance of technology monitoring. In conclusion,
although
people
 might lose confidence in their
government
 from them disrespecting their privacy,
however
, I believe that the advantage of being able to prevent catastrophic loss of human lives by improving security surpasses any downside.
Submitted by oyeludevictor on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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