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Band 2.5

Some people believe charity organization should only offer help to people of their own countries. Another claim that these organizations should give aid to people in great need wherever they live. Discuss both opinions and tell which side do you agree?

#people #charity #organization #offer #countries #organizations #aid #side
Helping
people
 is a great thing to do,
thats
Correct your spelling
that's
 why paying
charity
 is part of human being responsibility, there are a lot of
organizations
 who
working
Change the form of the verb
work
show examples
 on
charity
 collecting,
catogarizing
Correct your spelling
categorizing
 and paying, some
organizations
 are only paying in local society , others are helping all over the world ,
next
paragaraph
Correct your spelling
paragraph
paragraphs
 I will write about
this
 two ways of paying
charity
.
First
 , some
organzations
Correct your spelling
organizations
 just pay in their countries ,
Moreover
 in local
communitites
Correct your spelling
communities
not
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,not
show examples
 even the whole country. I
dissagree
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disagree
 with
this
 way of
paying
Correct your spelling
playing
show examples
 because it seems so limited .
Nevertheless
, it is better than
stop
Wrong verb form
stopping
show examples
 doing
charity
 but I still believe paying for porer
people
 is quite better.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 other
organizations
paying
Wrong verb form
pay
show examples
charity
 for all
people
 who over need whenever they live, no matter their citizens or races or even their
reiligions
Correct your spelling
religions
religion
religious
. They do believe humans are humans.I completely agree with these
organizations
 because
,
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apply
show examples
the
averege
Correct your spelling
average
 of poverty is different from
country
Correct pronoun usage
one country
show examples
 to
other
Correct pronoun usage
another
show examples
. the poorest in
development
Replace the word
developing
show examples
 countries are
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
richer than
middle
Add an article
the middle
show examples
 class in some
of
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apply
show examples
African
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the African
show examples
 countries !! Unfortunately, it is
Correct article usage
the truth
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truth
Replace the word
true
show examples
.
Finally
, one of the main problems our world still facing and need to solve is poverty. The politicians , United Nations and all
people
 have to help each other to
fininsh
Correct your spelling
finish
this
 issue. Hopefully, we will see the solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 problem very soon.
Submitted by saadcanberra on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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