Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree

The issue of which profession should be given more pay is of paramount importance and detachable. some
people
believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
who work in professional fields like doctors and teachers ought to be paid more than celebrities in sports and entertainment. I completely agree with
this
view and
this
essay will discuss why teachers and doctors should benefit from a higher wage compared to sports and entertainment personalities.
To begin
with, the most rational justification is that professional workers would play a vital role in health services and education systems in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
That is
, when getting a higher salary, they are more likely to be motivated to carry out the duties of their positions and provide students and the general population with more efficient learning methods and healthcare services. A good illustration of
this
is the teacher who is fulfilling in terms of finances and they might take advantage of high-tech computers and the internet to boost the efficiency of teaching.
As a result
of easy access to educational facilities, students’ learning could (would) be facilitated.
In contrast
, some
people
claim that entertainers and athletes
are deserved
Wrong verb form
deserve
show examples
to get a larger amount of money. they firmly insist that sports stars are required to
have
Verb problem
make
show examples
a lot of effort or put themselves in danger in order to become famous and accomplished.
However
, I do not find
this
argument convincing healthcare professionals or educators have to undergo years of training so as to obtain qualifications and contribute to the community. Sarah Gilbert who is a medical professional,
for example
, if she did not take a risk for
people
around the world, the Oxford vaccine would not
design
Wrong verb form
be designed
show examples
.
To sum up
, I totally agree with the idea that
the
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apply
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health specialists and guides deserve to get paid more than athletes and entertainers in that they could(can) have significant effects on
people
’s well-being and education.
Submitted by fereshte.naderi.ir on

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task response
Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the main argument of whether professional workers like doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities.
coherence cohesion
Consider restructuring the essay to ensure a smoother flow between paragraphs. Use linking words and transitional phrases to improve coherence.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional workers
  • Societal contribution
  • Scarcity
  • Market forces
  • Consumer demand
  • Role models
  • Economic impact
  • Revenue generation
  • Fair compensation
  • Social equity
  • Intrinsic rewards
  • Job satisfaction
  • Media rights
  • Merchandise sales
  • Public figures
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