The crime rate nowadays is decreasing compare to the past due to advanced technologies which can prevent and solve crime. Do you agree or disagree?
In
this
present world
criminal incidents seem declined more than ever. Even supermarkets, streets and grocery stores have Add a comma
,world
technology
such
as CCTV cameras to record any situations. But it is disagreed
that Change to the active voice
disagrees
has disagreed
technologies
can totally prevent crime
. Analysing the news, that still has violence incidents every single day.
First
, the development of technologies
assists our life to be savers but it does not mean these able to stop starving people from stealing a food
. Remove the article
food
a portion of food
For instance
, a supermarket has the securities cameras around the store and a thief can go inside and grab some mike, then
walk away. Sadly, these cameras can only record footage but they can not solve crimes. Therefore
, this
expresses how technologies
can help us but can not stop crime
.
Second
, nowadays social network is one of the most famous technology
, we can create social media group in order to warn people to avoid area
that has a high Add an article
the area
an area
crime
rate. For example
, a Facebook page announced and reported about a nightclub that has sexual harassment in theirs. This
means the criminal incident already happened. Thus
, technologies
will never solve the crime
they can only help us to refuse incoming crime
in the same situation.
In conclusion, I recognize this
current day is better than the past, because of technology
. However
, It looks like we effort to solve the problem at the leaves ,not from the roots, this
means the crime
will not decreased
cause of Wrong verb form
decrease
technology
but it will fall down by
individuals.Change preposition
to
Submitted by phuchanate on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?