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In some countries, online shopping is getting more popular and replacing shopping in stores. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #stores
Nowadays, shopping in
stores
 is less popular than online shopping in several
nation
Change to a plural noun
nations
show examples
. While others said that it has some disadvantages, I would argue that its advantages are greater. Online shopping has many
benefits
.
Firstly
, because
products
 are available in online
stores
, consumers often easily buy
this
Change the determiner
this product
these products
show examples
products
 within minutes or even seconds. Compare with shopping in
stores
, having too
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
 people in these
stores
 could lead to over-crowded.
Then
 having
long
Correct article usage
a long
show examples
que
Correct your spelling
queue
queues
 and consumers might difficult to select the
products
.
Secondly
, online
stores
 offer diversity and variety
sizes
Change preposition
of sizes
show examples
 or forms of
products
 for shoppers; so
this
 provides their options and
allowing
Wrong verb form
allows
show examples
 them
buy
Add the particle
to buy
show examples
 everything that they want.
Finally
, because of convenience, unlimitation of
choice’s
Change noun form
choice
show examples
 shoppers and
others
Correct pronoun usage
other
show examples
benefits
, online shopping could become a trend, people tend to shop online.
This
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
 enormous profit for sellers or
manufactures
Replace the word
manufacturers
show examples
.
Besides
 its
benefits
, online shopping has some drawbacks.
First
, because
process
Add an article
the process
show examples
 of
products
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 problems or accident; or
also
 due to company, the
products
 may be
Wrong verb form
damaged
show examples
damages
Correct your spelling
damaged
show examples
 or destroyed. In some
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
,
products
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
bought by consumers could be lost or
deliveried
Correct your spelling
delivered
 to the wrong address.
This
 leads to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
reliable
Replace the word
reliability
show examples
 of buyers.
Moreover
, as a wide range of
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
, shoppers
usually
Add a missing verb
are usually
show examples
addict
Wrong verb form
addicted
show examples
 to
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. They spend too much time on their screen
to shop
Change the verb form
shopping
show examples
 online.
As a result
, they waste
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time and
this
 may have negative effects on their health. Meanwhile, it is true that going to the shopping mall
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
 some
benefits
, I think it is better to shop online.
Submitted by Eteacher on

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    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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