IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The main purpose of public libraries is to provide books, and they should not waste their limited resources and space on providing expensive hi-tech media such as computer software, videos and DVDs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

#purpose #libraries #books #waste #resources #space #media #computer #software #videos #dvds
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A concerning technology effective has grown in importance over the past years. It is undeniable that electrical tools might consume other limited resources
such
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 as
space
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 and budget,
however
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, I strongly believe that high technology will benefit
people
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 as much as books.
This
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 essay will discuss the advantages that outweigh the disadvantages of having hi-tech media as well as give examples of its benefit.
First
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 of all, the main purpose of libraries is to facilitate the source of
knowledge
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, according to Oxbridge Dictionary.
This
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 means any tools that are able to deliver targeted
information
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 should be taken into account.
Although
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having
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
hardware
such
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 as computers, videos, and DVDs take some
space
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, they collect
knowledge
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 and
information
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 uncountably, while, a book contains only one content or topic.
This
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 shows that a computer requires lesser
space
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 than a textbook. Another benefit of e-media
is simplify
Change the verb form
is simplified
is simplifying
show examples
information
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 searching. In the past,
people
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 have to find data on their own since there were no supporting tools. Nowadays, the data can be found easily with a finger click, thanks to the internet.
Knowledge
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 and
information
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 are connected which allow
people
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, especially researchers and students, to conduct research and finish their project. Searching on the internet is far faster than opening every single textbook. From my personal experience, e-media
such
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 as videos and DVDs are more attractive and gain my attention to study and learn than reading a text. In conclusion, I believe that the advantages of using hi-tech media will empower and optimise the use of
knowledge
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 in the library and could be a favourite source for some
people
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. Choosing the right media depends on content
instead
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 of concern about
space
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 consumption.
Submitted by preempalita on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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