IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Nowadays many people travel to foreign countries for pleasure. Some believe this travel has a negative impact on the countries travelled to. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #travel #countries #pleasure #believe #impact
For today
Change preposition
Today
show examples
 the
tourism
 sector has been developed by countries because of its great opportunity to develop some particular sphere.
However
, people are divided in their opinion regarding the pessimistic consequences of
tourism
 migration on the targeted country.I partially agree with
this
 view and I will explain more details in
following
Correct article usage
the following
show examples
 paragraphs. On the one hand, tourist flow plays an essential role in a country’s economy. There is no doubt that tourists are the most highly valued consumers who have a great influence on the service sector. One successful example is that the Maldives as a tropic government was built entirely on
tourism
 and managed to become one of the most recognizable places around the world. Unfortunately, there is a threat that archipelagos like the Maldives could disappear due to global warming.
On the other hand
, if more tourists visit natural sites and landmarks, it might lead to pollution and the disappearance of those places.
Moreover
, the increasing number of tourists entails an increased air, rail and road transport thereby raising the level of greenhouse gases above the atmosphere. An earlier example mentioned the possibility that the Republic of Maldives could have become a victim of rising ocean levels.
This
 indirect effect of
tourism
 can be seen all over the world whether there is a tourist flow or not. So not only is it worth worrying about the direct consequences as a breach of a rule or ethnic strife or racism and nazism during a country visit, but
also
 to prevent the indirect negative impact on the entire globe. To conclude, travel brings many positive factors to both the tourist and the country, but it will happen if both sides will be friendly to each other. Above all, the government plays an important role
avoiding
Change preposition
in avoiding
show examples
 all the disadvantages.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural exchanges
  • Global connections
  • Tourism boosts
  • Local economy
  • Over-tourism
  • Environmental degradation
  • Landmarks
  • Commodification of culture
  • Authentic cultural expressions
  • Cultural homogenization
  • Tourism infrastructure
  • Public services
  • Disrespect local customs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: