Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative

Many

people

argue that the effective way to reduce

crime

is to give longer

prison

sentences, while others say that there are better alternative

ways

Although

longer

prison

sentences contribute to reducing the number of crimes, I believe that there are more effective

ways

to decrease violence in

people

's life. On the one hand, extending the

prison

term of

criminals

provides a sense of community security.

This

is because many

people

are afraid of being the

criminal target, so they think that punishing

criminals

forever in

prison

is the most effective way.

For example

, individuals who live in a complex that has been robbed have

traumatic

Add a missing verb

been traumatic

show examples

about

this

case and felt scared every time, if their house is the

target.

Therefore

, they felt

more safe

Replace the words

safer

show examples

if the

crime

was been jailed forever.

On the other hand

, implementing more effective

ways

to prevent criminality

such

as giving new skills to crimes might be better than extending the

prison

term.

This

is important in ensuring the survival of

crime

in society. Many

criminals

commit crimes because they are forced by circumstances.

For instance

, when a person steals money from a house, he admits that his

crime

was committed to

provide

Change the verb form

providing

show examples

food for his family, particularly his child

Replace the punctuation

...

show examples

As a result

, new skills taught during

prison

can propel former

criminals

into good

people

and have good behaviour too. In conclusion,

although

giving longer

prison

sentences potential to reduce

crime

in society, I believe that the effective

ways

Fix the agreement mistake

way

show examples

to minimize

crime

Change the verb form

are

show examples

to teach new skills during the

prison

term.

Submitted by fasikhullisanugerah on Fri Apr 22 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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In some countries around the world, there have been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of homeschooling education outweight this advantages?

In their advertising businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way. Why is this the case? Do you think it’s a positive or negative development?

More and more plastic is polluting cities, the countryside and oceans in the world. What are the problems caused by plastic wastes? What measures should be taken to solve it?