Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neighbourhood #sports #children

Some people believe that performing

community

service

can help

students

as well as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. In some schools,

community

service

is one of the mandatory requirements for graduation. In my point of view, I reckon that giving

students

opportunities to

involve

Add a missing verb

be involve

show examples

in unpaid services can prove

advantages

Replace the word

advantageous

show examples

for both

community

and them. Volunteering activities can help

students

to take

responsibilities

Fix the agreement mistake

responsibility

show examples

as open-minded.

Community

service

develops an increased sense of social responsibility which is a global view of society and a heart

for

Correct your spelling

forgive

show examples

give

Change the verb form

giving

show examples

back and helping others.

For instance

, the youths who

work

at the retirement centres or orphanages learn

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

patience and empathy from interacting with the people from those places who have vastly different backgrounds. Due to those benefits got from the experience of working as

volunteer

Add an article

a volunteer

show examples

, I strongly agree that

community

service

should be

compulsary

Correct your spelling

compulsory

as one of the programs at high schools.

Furthermore

, by engaging in

community

work

students

can build relationships and social connectedness with peers and adults. The more people they meet, the more social awareness they have.

Voluteer

Correct your spelling

Volunteer

activities allow them to have the opportunity to meet many other youths from different places which

exposes

Change the verb form

expose

show examples

them to diversity and multiculturalism too.

For example

, if an adult has to

work

at a retirement centre, he or she is likely to meet the other adults with the matching mindset and interests either from the same or different cultures, by which they can connect easily to each other regardless of which background they came from. they

also

will learn that being a good person does not depend on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

religion, status in life, race or skin

color

Change the spelling

colour

show examples

Therefore

, from my point of view,

community

service

should be an essential requirement for school graduation as the things learned from unpaid social

service

are so valuable that cannot be taught in the school curriculum. In conclusion, the rewarding experiences acquired from doing

community

service

help the

students

to grow as a person with better interpersonal skills. That being so, I fully support the idea that schools should encourage the

students

work

in unpaid services in the

community

by making

community

service

a necessity as part of the school programmes.

Submitted by jimmehan3 on Fri Apr 22 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

362 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

compulsory
high school programmes
unpaid community service
charity
improving the neighbourhood
teaching sports
sense of responsibility
empathy
broader perspective
societal issues
college applications
job applications
positive impact

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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

More and more people are using computers and electric devices to access information, so there is no need for printed books, magazines and newspaper. To what extent do you agree or disagree

'It is often argued that children must be protected from unsuitable material on TV and the Internet by government censorship. Others say that this is the parents' responsibility to control what their children do and watch. To what extent do you think that this is true?

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phone. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

All the people in a company should be treated equally and provided with the same numbers of vacations in a year.To what extent do you agree or disagree?