IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #media #privacy #price #fame #invasion #life
It is commonly believed that most famous
people
 should attend more
privacy
 from
media
 , while some
people
 think that lost
privacy
 is the price of their flame. In the following paragraphs , both of these views will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached. It is apparent that famous
people
 have been treated unfairly by the
media
 over the decades
such
 as rude interviews, fake news and bullying. These things directly impact celebrities which means
people
 might forget that famous
people
 are ordinary
people
 same as others. They have brains, hearts and emotions which means the
media
 should concern more about
people
's feelings . Apart from celebrities' emotions, every country has laws to protect populations' life.
In other words
, to make someone feel bad or unsafe is a law's break. 
On the other hand
, being famous
people
 should be replaced by private life. It is true to say that sometimes actor, actress ,singer and artists might present their own life on television or social
media
 platforms to engage their Fanclub which means it is one term of marketing.
In other words
, famous
people
 should accept if they would like to be more famous.
However
, From my point of view, I strongly agree that celebrities should be given more
privacy
 because everyone should be respectful of others ,even if they are famous or not.
In addition
, Laws should be more powerful in the future same as the
media
 should be more concerned about
privacy
.  In conclusion,
people
 should try to understand others' emotions and respect each other which means if we can balance these two things, famous
people
 would not treat unfairly anymore.
Submitted by namhom11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: