More and more people want to own items such as cars, clothing and other things, that are made by famous brands. What are the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Consumption has been getting increase day by day since
Correct article usage
the 90`s
show examples
90`s
Change noun form
90s
show examples
. While the most important
Correct your spelling
thing
show examples
think
Correct your spelling
thing
show examples
is not only
use
Fix the infinitive
to use
show examples
up, plus ,
shown
Change the verb form
to show
show examples
what you consume as well . In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
it has demerits more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
merits. I can point to 2
reason
which is social media and couldn`t find anything for
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
. Let`s get discuss the causes below . As we said before one of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
for "fancy consumption patterns" is social media getting a foothold in our
life
as days pass. Especially one of the most
Replace the word
affecting
show examples
effecting
Correct your spelling
affecting
show examples
the users
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
the others which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
called
instagram
Change the capitalization
Instagram
show examples
. Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people`s
Add an article
the people`s
show examples
passion is
demonstrate
Fix the infinitive
to demonstrate
show examples
their
life
to
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
follow them, by
reason
of they wanted to prove that they have
a
Change the article
an
show examples
amazing
life
.
Altough
Correct your spelling
Although
if we have a chance
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the look at backgrounds
all
Change preposition
of all
show examples
the people`s
life
, we might find a lot of trouble there. I`ll
called
Change the verb form
call
be called
show examples
this
fake
life
and it can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lead to
psycological
Correct your spelling
psychological
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
as
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
bipolar affective
disorer
Correct your spelling
disorder
or multiple personality disorder. In related to as a
second
reason
I`d to say that : existential vacuum. Many people
thinking
Wrong verb form
think
show examples
there is
only
Add an article
the only
show examples
option
Correct pronoun usage
one option
show examples
they have for
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
and
this
is
quality
Correct article usage
a quality
show examples
life
with money and spending. Most of them couldn`t see the keyword which is self-improvement. I believe overconsumption notedly keen on luxury is made
unfelicitious
Correct your spelling
infelicitous
felicitous
. Exemplary Steven Jobs is one of the richest
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
in the world
besides
we can see him all the time with black t-short and
jean
Fix the agreement mistake
jeans
show examples
. I`m trying to
telling
Change the verb
tell
show examples
be rich and loved to rich love to be rich is different.
As a result
, I think brand obsession
shoul
Correct your spelling
should
be stopped.
Person
Add an article
A person
The person
show examples
is
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
obsessed
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
brands , shown its
life
,
countingmore
Correct your spelling
counting more
and that`s why people
becaming
Correct your spelling
becoming
unpleasure , unsatisfied. We should turn inside and we should listen
out
Change preposition
to
show examples
our thoughts.
Submitted by b.safakozel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: