The recent popularity of online shopping will result in the end of the high street shops. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#popularity #street #shops

In recent years, the growth of online shopping

Verb problem

has

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leading

Wrong verb form

led

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to the shutting down of many smaller

businesses

. Though I see that many educated adults prefer to use the Internet via websites and cell phones for their purchases, I believe there is a market segment of elderly people and an uneducated population for street shops.

To begin

with, the significance of procuring goods online increased during the

covid

Correct your spelling

COVID-19

pandemic period. People started to realise the benefits of reduced waiting time, increased ease of selection and improved productivity of lives by ordering things online.

For instance

, our family started to buy groceries and vegetables using BigBasket where we can have the smart list ready from past purchases, and the whole procurement can be finished in a few minutes by simply adding the items to the cart. Henceforth, e-shopping provides extreme benefits of significantly saving time and providing a contact-less purchase to keep one safe from

corona

Correct your spelling

coronavirus

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spread.

As a result

of these benefits, the growth rate of online shopping is rapid and threatening to small

businesses

While

the educated section of society is very comfortable using computers and smartphones to order goods online, the uneducated and elderly section of society prefers to go to local markets for their shopping. Not only that these people find it difficult to upgrade themselves to an online mode of buying things but

also

they find that prices are not reasonable enough to negotiate with vendors

Change preposition

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the local market.

For example

, my parents still prefer to visit nearby shops to buy an item for the satisfaction of bargaining it for a discount. As street vendors do not add transportation costs to the purchase price, there is still a demand for buying goods from them and it is still preferred by the lower-income groups.

For

this

reason, I believe these markets do not vanish completely

due to

the emergence of online

businesses

. In conclusion, I believe the local shops in towns and cities still hold their value by offering reasonable prices and bargains and would not be easily superseded by online

businesses

, though it might happen in

far-future

Correct your spelling

the future

show examples

when everyone in

the

Correct article usage

apply

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society becomes educated and elevated in their social status.

Submitted by nkamatam on Sun May 01 2022

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task response

Ensure a more balanced approach by acknowledging the potential impact of online shopping on high street shops for all demographics.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the organization of ideas by enhancing the clarity of the introduction and conclusion. Ensure that the main points are logically presented and supported throughout the essay.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

365 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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