IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many countries proportion of older people is steadily increasing . Does this trend have more positive or negative effects on society?

It has been observed that in many nations the
numbers
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number
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 of elderly
people
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 are constantly proliferating. I
,
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apply
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beleive
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believe
 that
this
Linking Words
 trend
have
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has
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 more
reparcussions
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repercussions
 on the community, which will outline in
forthcoming
Correct article usage
the forthcoming
show examples
 paragraphs with reasons and examples. To embark, there are many demerits behind rising the older generation in society.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
economy
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the economy
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 of
country
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the country
a country
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is significantly reduce
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is significantly reduced
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.
This
Linking Words
 is to state that, aged
people
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 may not able to contribute
into
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to
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 the work as efficiently as
younger
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the younger
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 generation.
Also
Linking Words
, they may not able to adopt
a
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apply
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modern technology to
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
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 output and performance.
Therefore
Linking Words
, multinational companies based on government are not able to generate good revenue.
Thus
Linking Words
, the financial
gowth
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growth
 of
nation
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the nation
a nation
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 is impaired;
couriers
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couriers'
courier's
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 economy decline.
For example
Linking Words
, in the USA, senior citizens are rising in numbers, which possess a threat to the nation about financial crises.
Moreover
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,
unemployment
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the unemployment
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 rate is gradually
increases
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
. To elaborate on
this
Linking Words
, as the older
people
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increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
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 they continue with their work till later stage of lives.
As a result
Linking Words
, the cut-throat competition will take place in
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job
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the job
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 market. The younger
generation
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isgeneration
wasgeneration
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 not able to find
suitable
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a suitable
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job
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position
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positions
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 in organizations.
For instance
Linking Words
, in
developed
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a developed
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 nation, the
uk
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UK
 , it is commonly seen that owning
to
Replace the word
too
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 many aged
people
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 are continuing their
job
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 in
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 sixties ergo youngsters may not find vacancies. In conclusion, it can be commented that rising numbers of elderly can lead to
negatively
Correct article usage
a negatively
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 impact on
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the
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overall financial development of
community
Correct article usage
the community
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 and
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
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 competition in
Add an article
the
show examples
job
Use synonyms
 market.

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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