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Writing Samples
Band 4

The recent popularity of online shopping will result in the end of high street shops. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#popularity #street #shops
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In
this
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 contemporary world, it is a controversial issue that
street
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shops
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 will be removed by online shopping.
Although
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 I accept that shopping via the
internet
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Internet
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cause
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causes
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 some negatives for
street
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 boutiques, I am mostly of the opinion that
street
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shops
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 will never lose their popularity. On the one hand, adequate evidence is obtainable to substantiate the concept that there are many preferences for online shopping which causes some problems for high
street
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shops
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. The concrete reason is saving money. The price is suitable for everyone on the websites because the company do not pay salary and some taxes.
For instance
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, Zara
clothes
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 are cheaper than
street
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shops
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. It is
also
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 possible to say that there are many products and is not possible to all sell in the shop. One good illustration of
this
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 is
cloth
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clothing
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 and shoe
shops
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 since some companies sell only
season
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seasonal
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 products in the
street
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 boutique and other
clothes
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 and shoes
sell
Wrong verb form
are sold
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 on their website. These factors cause some negatives for
street
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shops
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.
On the other hand
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, shopping via
street
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 shop has many good reasons and
hence
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 I think online shopping will never win
traditional
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over traditional
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 shopping. Foremost among them is that
people
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 enjoy shopping with friends in the
street
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shops
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. I deem that walking the streets and same time looking at some
street
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 boutiques is attractive for many
people
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.
In addition
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, the product is obtained in the
street
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 markets faster than through online delivery.
For example
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, orders are delivered
a
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in a
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minimum of 3 days
many
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in many
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 companies but if you go to the
street
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shops
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, you can get products easily in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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seconds. Another reason why I believe that
street
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shops
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 will never lose their popularity is
becuase
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because
 the majority of
people
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 face size problems when they order
clothes
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 and shoes.
Therefore
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, many
people
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 prefer going to
shops
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 and checking the size of
clothes
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 on their bodies.
To conclude
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, I reiterate that there are innumerable factors supporting that
street
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shops
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' popularity will remain throughout the years.
As a result
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, I am mostly of the opinion that online shopping may not vanish
street
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shops
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.
Submitted by hesenovhemid121 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay contains relevant ideas and examples, but the structure and organization of your points are unclear. You need to work on presenting your ideas in a more logical and cohesive manner.
task response
While you have addressed the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping, your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Make sure to provide a clear thesis statement and a summary of your main points in the introduction, and restate your position in the conclusion.
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