Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Profession plays a pivotal role in the earning of an individual. An eminent sportsman can earn an abundance of money compared to the various other vital occupations. It predisposes to
the
controversies where a number of people agree with it Correct article usage
apply
whereas
others considered
it as not fair. I believe that sportspeople achieve Wrong verb form
consider
success
in their career
through herculean efforts and they deserve to earn more.
Numerous occupations compared to sports
has
a significant role in the sake of humanity. Though working hard from dawn to dusk for the betterment of the world, they still earn less salary. Scientists, Change the verb form
have
for example
, in the search for life on different planets put tremendous efforts into the research and implementation, even though their wages are not high. Hence
, the government has to think of such
a profession that brings change to the
lives and pays a considerable amount to them based on their work.
Change the word
their
However
, an individual who belongs to the sports
background justifies their high deal income for two reasons. Firstly
, they made sweaty efforts to reach the throne of success
. They put their career
at high risk by selecting sports
against any educational courses. For instance
, if they fail as a sportsperson, they do not have any other options to earn money. Secondly
, unlike other professions, the span of their earnings is very short. At a certain age, they would not able
to give Add a missing verb
be able
performance
and with all Correct article usage
a performance
success
, they may lose their career
. Therefore
, a famous sportsman deserves a well-figure pay scale during their career
.
In conclusion, there are various other occupations that are vital for a better future and still have their wages lower than the profession like sports
where successful sportspeople can make more money. In my opinion, by risking their career
and working hard to achieve success
, they justify what they earn.Submitted by hvyas on
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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by ensuring a clear progression of ideas throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but can be strengthened by providing a clearer thesis statement and summarizing the key points.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with more specific examples and elaborate on them to provide a deeper insight into your arguments.
task achievement
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the prompt by discussing both views (for and against) in more depth and providing balanced arguments.