IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. what do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

#countries #weight #people #levels #health #fitness #measures
Health
 is the most precious thing for mankind. It can change the fate of mankind and improve the status of the
people
. These days,
people
 are not much concerned about their
health
 status and it is due to their busy life schedules. Most
people
 tend to consume junk foods and unhealthy oil-rich processed foods as their main meals. Those foods consist of high-calorie intake.
Then
, it will lead to an increase in the average weight of the man. The average weight of a person is known as Body Mass Index(BMI). It should maintain within a range of 18.5 to 24,9 kg/m2. having a high BMI value is known as obesity, it means almost above 25kg/m2.
People
 who are recognized as obese can be vulnerable to life-threatening conditions
such
 as heart attack, diabetes, cholesterol deposition in blood vessels, and many non-communicable diseases. These non-communicable diseases are accountable for the most death and high rate of morbidity and mortality. The main reasons for these unhealthy habits are bad lifestyles and dietary patterns.
This
 problem can be solved by implementing time to time
food
 regulations policies and these acts can create a huge change in the
community
. The government should maintain good
food
 regulations and update
food
 label descriptions to aware
people
 of the
food
 consistency and ingredients. As well as mass media can affect on day today's diet habits and influence
health
 promotion and campaigns
also
. Physical fitness programs can be conducted under qualified supervision to improve their physical status and to aware the
community
 of these fatal conditions.
Although
, organic garden concepts can be arranged by the government with the help of relevant institutions as
health
 promotion campaigns to encourage the
community
 to consume homemade vegetables and fruits.
Then
people
 will automatically tend to harvest these days today's needs on their own. If the
community
 tends to activate these steps, the
next
 generation will not be vulnerable to these deathly, fatal, life-threatening
health
 conditions.
Submitted by duleekadissanayake123 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary
  • obesity
  • overweight
  • physical activity
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • exercise
  • unhealthy diet
  • fast food
  • urbanization
  • modernization
  • stress
  • awareness
  • education
  • government intervention
  • policies
  • promotion
  • sports
  • fitness programs
  • health education
  • taxation
  • public transportation
  • infrastructure
  • parks
  • recreational spaces
What to do next:
Look at other essays: