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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many animals today are being hunted to the point of extinctions. What can be done to tackle this problem?

#animals #point #extinctions
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Humans have been so cruel
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
animal
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a long time. Earlier, royal
people
Use synonyms
 used to kill
animals
Use synonyms
 to show bravery;
also
Linking Words
, they were using their
skin
Use synonyms
 in different ways. The same scenario is going on today but not royal
people
Use synonyms
, but everyone wants to
use
Use synonyms
animals
Use synonyms
’ fur,
skin
Use synonyms
, nails, horns, and teeth to design something.
Also
Linking Words
, they
use
Use synonyms
 it to create medicine.
This
Linking Words
 essay will describe how we can stop killing
animals
Use synonyms
 for selfish reasons. I have seen
people
Use synonyms
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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demanding various animal
products
Use synonyms
 to fulfil their requirements.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I have seen the demand for winter jackets, which are made from animal fur,
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 increasing so rapidly in cold countries. There are some companies which are selling
this
Linking Words
 kind of jacket at a very high cost. So,
people
Use synonyms
 purchase
this
Linking Words
 jacket to show their status in society only.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 are using wild
animals
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’
skin
Use synonyms
 to design their houses and offices;
also
Linking Words
, rich communities
use
Use synonyms
animals
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’
skin
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 on their chairs and car seats; several
products
Use synonyms
 are made from leather-like wallets, belts, bags, jackets,
clothes
Correct word choice
and clothes
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.
People
Use synonyms
 are selling these
products
Use synonyms
 at very high costs and openly in the market without any restrictions.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 some animal
products
Use synonyms
 to cure their
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, in India, there are some ayurvedic medicines which include cow’s pee.
Also
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 animal
products
Use synonyms
 for their
skin
Use synonyms
 treatments. Production of animal-made
products
Use synonyms
 is increasing because of
people
Use synonyms
’s increase in buying these
products
Use synonyms
. Companies are showing fancy animal-made
products
Use synonyms
 that attract
people
Use synonyms
;
thus
Linking Words
, the need for animal-made
products
Use synonyms
 grows fast. There are several ways to stop these demands.
People
Use synonyms
 are selling
this
Linking Words
 product because there are no restrictions on selling
this
Linking Words
 type of thing. So, the government should take a step against these businesses, which can stop producing animal
products
Use synonyms
. In the end, it will stop killing innocent
animals
Use synonyms
. Vegan supporters should spread awareness in society, especially around the community of the
people
Use synonyms
 who
use
Use synonyms
 animal
products
Use synonyms
, which can grow animal love in their
heart
Fix the agreement mistake
hearts
show examples
, and they stop using
this
Linking Words
 type of item.
People
Use synonyms
 should understand that the cost behind these
products
Use synonyms
 is not money, but it is an innocent animal.
People
Use synonyms
 should stop buying these
products
Use synonyms
, and once the demand for them goes down, they will stop killing
animals
Use synonyms
. To conclude, I would like to say that when
people
Use synonyms
 and government take action against the producers of animal
products
Use synonyms
, it will decrease the
use
Use synonyms
 of
animals
Use synonyms
 by itself.
Submitted by skrodrigo030 on

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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