When new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks and sports facilities rather than shopping centers for people to spend their time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is often argued, that while designing new towns more
provision
Fix the agreement mistake
provisions
show examples
for
construction
Add an article
the construction
show examples
of
parks
and
sports
amenities should be considered rather than shopping malls. I completely agree with
this
notion that
parks
and
sports
are more important for public welfare as compared to shopping
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
.
Firstly
, building more
parks
and providing better
sports
facilities will enhance
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the
show examples
healthy lifestyle of individuals. Recreational activities are very important for all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age groups whether children, teenagers, adults or old age people.
Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
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, due to
sedentary
Correct article usage
the sedentary
show examples
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
public
parks
provide a good platform
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
all individuals to relax and spend their time in leisure and it is beneficial for both physical as well as psychological wellness.
For instance
, Chandigarh is considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Add a hyphen
best-planned
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best
Add an article
a best
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planned city in India.The reason behind
this
is its
designing
Replace the word
design
show examples
and
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
salient feature of
this
city is public
parks
in every society which not only contributes to
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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life style
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lifestyle
show examples
but
keeping
Wrong verb form
keeps
show examples
Correct your spelling
environment
enviroment
Correct article usage
the enviroment
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pollution free
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pollution-free
show examples
.
Secondly
, constructing more shopping malls means, people will more often opt to go
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
shopping,
thus
there will be
Add an article
a
show examples
rise in their expenditure.
On the other hand
building
Add a comma
,building
show examples
more
sports
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
will help the youngsters to do
more well
Replace the words
better
show examples
in their respected field. It will give
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
better players to the nation and they can achieve more awards and honours for their countries in
olympics
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Olympics
show examples
or world federation games. One of the best
example
Fix the agreement mistake
examples
show examples
proving
this
is Japan
who
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
won maximum prizes in
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
olympic
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Olympic
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games in 2020.
This
was possible because their
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
has constructed more
sports
academies in every city to promote and boost the players. To conclude, recreational grounds and
sports
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
should
be build
Change the verb form
be building
be built
show examples
more while planning new towns rather than shopping malls.
This
will not only be beneficial for an individual but for
prosperity
Add an article
the prosperity
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of
whole
Add an article
the whole
a whole
show examples
nation.
Submitted by drvishal13 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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