Many factured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
Health
problems
are associated with to consume
Change the verb form
consuming
sugar
and the process of manufacturing has the responsibility. However
, people
need to consume less sugar
and increasing the cost of this
product could encourage them to less consume. In my opinion, I agree sugar
products have to be more expensive than healthy food.
A good reason to increase the cost of sugar
products is decreasing
obesity in society. At the present, many obese Change the verb form
to decrease
people
have cardiovascular problems
and this
causes other associated illness
like depression, as a consequence, it will increase the rate of suicide being a big problem for countries. Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
For example
, many researchers said that if people
consume less sugar
, a human beings
could have better mental health. Correct the article-noun agreement
human beings
a human being
Furthermore
, another benefit is the quality of life would be better for everyone.
Another point to consider is countries could have a diminished rate of diabetes. Moreover
, it is known diseases like diabetes contribute to people
having other problems
increasing the blind
Replace the word
blindness
on
Change preposition
of
people
. In addition
, the major benefit to society is having less public spending investing money in people
to encourage the practice of sports and saving money on medicaments and increasing people
could eat more food without sugar
like vegetables. For example
, if a country has less amount of people
with the disease, could have more happy people
reducing mental problems
.
In conclusion, encouraging people
to have a low sugar
consumption could get the
big benefit for society and I agree that the cost of products with Correct article usage
a
a high levels
of Correct the article-noun agreement
a high level
high levels
sugar
ought to be expensive.Submitted by roberto.carrascopizarro on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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